It's time, it's time, it's Final Fantasy X time! Yes boys, girls and Knicks fans, we've come to the point where the best Final Fantasy game (suck it seven) must be talked about. It's one of my favorite games of all time, right there with Alan Wake, Tony Hawk Pro Skater 2 and Ocarina of Time in the pantheon. Filled with those wonderful Blade Runner futuristic settings, a great story and a serious but not too serious tone, Final Fantasy X is, simply put, the bees knees. But what puts it over the top is the characters, a rich blend of leads and supporting characters that enthrall and captivate throughout the game. That's why we're here today. Right before I dive into playing some more Final Fantasy X, I'm going to give you the top ten characters in the game. This won't just be limited to the leads or playable characters; everyone is up for the taking (though, in fairness, most of them are main people). As per usual, if your favorite isn't as high as you want, don't take it personally. It's just my opinion after all. Oh boy, I'm going to get some mega hate mail over this one, aren't I? Eh, won't be the last time (though it may be the first). HIT THE MUSIC!
What a shock, the Ronso comes in last. Look you guys, Kimahri's not that bad. If you build him up correctly, he's actually a pretty bad ass character to use, and hey, he's at least not Seymour's man servant whose name I can't remember right now (the guy who says "LADY YUNA" like he's being neutered). That said, he's also stiffer than Hayden Christensen in Jumper (that was for you 'Plan!). And in the deep pool of talent that is Final Fantasy X characters, that's enough to keep the stoic Kimahri all the way down at ten. For the Lucha Underground fans reading, he's pretty much the Prince Puma of the group. Hey, not a thing wrong with that.
If Lulu wasn't such a badass, she'd be one slot below here. Kimahri may be a little too stoic for the non Batman crowd, but at least his only character trait isn't raging, bitter, unapologetic dick. That's pretty much what Lulu is. You see the way she treats Wakka? I mean yeah, he reminds her of her now dead love and he's totally a racist (more on that in a bit), but damn, Sofia Coppola in The Godfather Part III didn't take this kind of a beating. Again Lulu, you're lucky you're a badass. That cures all. Except racism. But we'll get to Wakka.
Is this low because, let's face it, Sin is pretty much a fin. You can't be a top five character in anything if you're really just an enlarged version of the San Jose Sharks logo. But man, could you ask for a more diabolical hater since the so called Beautiful? I mean first off, Sin's name is sin. It's so evil that his name is pretty much the fancy word for evil. You can't get more villainous than that! And secondly, the damn fin has wrecked more villages than Frieza and Vegeta combined. Great stuff. Again, can't put him too high on this list because, you know, fin and all. But man, Sin is pretty chill. And of course, it's mentioned in the best line in the game. You know the one.
Oh Seymour. Poor, poor, stuck in the closet Seymour. Yes people, let's just get it out of the way; Seymour is gay. Unless you're dumb, in denial or Pigpen from Out Cold, it's pretty clear that the Guado prince is seriously overcompensating for who he truly is. No wonder he becomes evil; it's always the people that can't accept themselves that turn to arranged marriages and patricide. A shame, for we all would've accepted Seymour. Beyond all that though, dude is a tough as nails boss. I think that's why I have him ranked higher than Sin here. Yes, Sin may be the main villain at the end of the day, but it's only a fin. Seymour is a real life nutball who you have to face several times in this game. Would you really complain if you switched the two around? I think not. Although, Seymour is Jecht doesn't have the same ring to it as Sin is Jecht does. Plus, that sort of fusion would weird out everyone, even Seymour's DBZ doppelganger Zarbon.
The first video game character in the history of time to be inspired by islander culture and, in the words of my brother, sport salon quality orange hair. You could actually make the argument that Wakka is the coolest person in this game; he looks cool, he plays blitzball, he pronounces brother "brudda" and he's tortured enough by his brother Chappu's death that you can feel bad for him. So why is Wakka this low here? Because he's RACIST! My goodness, you see the way he talks about the Al Bhed in this game, coupled with the reactions of all his companions every time he does? It's like watching Birth of the Nation if the Klu Klux Klan had orange hair on top of their cloaks! Yes, Wakka may eventually get over his prejudices and may eventually turn his life around once he realizes that the Yevon religion is as legit as Carmelo Anthony's gripes about Kristops Porzingis. That doesn't excuse the other two thirds of the game though. Dammit Wakka. We could've been friends! Now I just look at you like the cool grandparent who makes me cringe every time they say racist things.
Arguably the third villain in this whole ordeal, and not just because Sin is Jecht. It's time to be real again guys; Jecht is the worst. Yes, he might've been a good blitzball player and his heart may have been in the right place, but lord have mercy, what an absentee father he was. No wonder he ends up becoming Sin. That was more inevitable than Johnny Mundo having more success in the LU than WWE. I will always give the Jechtster this much though; without him, there is no Sin, and without Tidus' resentment towards him, there's no emotional center to Final Fantasy X that leads to the emotional payoff at the end. In short, just like Tidus, we needed Jecht. Even if he didn't need us, the rat bastard.
That's right kids, the protagonist isn't at #1! How is that possible? It must be madness. Not really. Tidus is a very strong lead overall; what easily could've been an Anakin Skywalker esq character is instead a well rounded character who anchors the story quite well. He's not flawless of course; remember that scene with the laughing? I'm still cringing. Beyond that though, Tidus is overall pretty cool, and it's his absence for most of Final Fantasy X2 that made that game far less interesting (well, that and a lack of stakes). The real reason he's this low; the other three people on here are really, really good. Like, Kris Bryant good. And yes, for those keeping score at home, we've now had references to hockey, basketball, the Chicago Cubs, Lucha Underground and a 1917 silent film in a Final Fantasy column. The lesson, as always; I might just be nuts.
Yuna is, simply put, a great character, so much so that at times, she steals Final Fantasy X away from Tidus. Seriously, wasn't there times where her plight as a summoner was more compelling than Tidus getting back to Zanarkand? Perhaps most importantly though, this girl is tough. You have to be in order to summon all sorts of hell beasts/aeons and go on a quest that is supposed to end in you going the way of Tara Reid's career. Add that on top of who her father was, her age and the fact that she was almost stuck in the most loveless marriage since Rose and Cal, and man, how can you not be impressed with her? Final Fantasy X isn't just about a young man trying to get home; it's about a young girl becoming a woman right before our very eyes. No wonder both X and X2 (not the X-Men movie!) were considered to be the strongest portrayals of women in the Final Fantasy series.
As much as I love the Yuna character, I just can't put her above the wonderfully unique Rikku. And truthfully, Rikku doesn't have half the qualities that Yuna has. She's far more sexualized than Yuna is (not that that's a bad thing necessarily), has far less depth, and while she can be a great combat character if you build her up right, she's not exactly the rest of the group. So why is she here? I just really like her, and not because she is very attractive. She's just a lot of fun. And in between all the serious stuff, Wakka's prejudices and Tidus' failed attempts at humor, Rikku is a welcome addition to the team. In fact, dare I say she's the heart and soul of the group; another young girl looking for her place, with the added stigma of having to do so while being an Al Bhed. Those poor people. Hated for using machines? If this were America, the Al Bhed would be running this country. Jeez, I can feel a breeze from 'Plan nodding so much at that statement. We now go live to his reaction.
If I can quote the late, great "Macho Man" Randy Savage, Auron is the CREAM OF DA CROP, YEAH! You're not getting any better in Final Fantasy X then their own, private Brock Lesnar/Mil Muertes. Auron does it all. He's the badass to end all badasses. He'll get you out of problems when you're low on health, supplies and battling one of those diabolical fiends out on the Thunder Planes. He'll continuously put Tidus in his place. Hell, he'll put anyone in their place. Most importantly, I think there's some very hidden depth in Auron that we don't see. Any one recall that flashback sequence where Auron subtly drops how much he misses Tidus' mother? Am I imagining things, or is there something more poignant behind that statement? Was Auron shacking up with her? Is that why he's so protective of Tidus? Why he's so guilty about his promise to Jecht? It's very John Wayne in The Searchers like if you think about it (though in fairness, there's more theories to Wayne's Ethan Edwards than there are to the JFK conspiracy). It doesn't help Auron get to number one; he's number one on how awesome he is in general. The depth just helps justify it even more. Keep on being the baddest man this side of Rikishi Auron. And no, I can't believe I just said that either.
That'll do it guys! I'll be back later. With what, only Cthulhu can say. Till then, yay America for doing the right thing yesterday, trade Carmelo, fire Stephen A. Smith, accept Kristops Porzingis as someone who will probably be better than everyone believes, and bow down to the immortal SCULLY!
Please change disks to continue...
Ray Cornelius from Iowa on December 24, 2017:
I don't know I really like Kimahri more then any of the others. Tidus was a close second, Wakka third. After that really don't have any favorites.
Alexis on October 15, 2017:
My list is exactly the same as yours. I loved Auron and Rikku especially.