Kenneth Avery is a Southern humorist with well over a thousand fans. The charm and wit in his writing span a nearly a decade.
First of all, let me tell you that I am completely-serious with this hub. Second. I know that I am crawling out of a limb with this one, but what harm could it do? There is no mention of guns, gun-play, fist-fights, gang violence, drug sales, police brutllity sexual harassment and those that I cannot mention. I make a terrible research editor.
America, by and large, is still a great place to be born, live, go to school, work, get married to a great-looking girl and best of all, eat. Yes. Eat one or two of my Ultimate Super Burgers until you have to sit down in a cool place, take a long nap, and do it again. And this is when we go off the rails. What I mean by 'eat' is in America there are so many different food tastes and it would take me (estimated) 10 hubs and more to complete them for publishing.
When I was a kid, I was strictly a fried chicken and potatoes man. That was until my brother-in-law turned me onto the all-American food: the hamburger. I was very excited. My brother-in-law always thought on a higher level. One day he took me and my folks to a local state-owned lake and then we had a barbecue. I was still excited. Even when he rolled-out the fresh ground chuck and laid it gently on the grill and the aroma hit me like a truck. Without one bite, I was hooked. I just had to eat one hamburger.
The first bite of my burger was as delicious as the last. My dad and mom were stunned. He never eats this much. Something is wrong, he said to my mom, who only bowed her head to pray for me. I was busy asking my brother-in-law to please give me one more burger. He chuckled and agreed. My sister whispered to him that she thought that I had a mental deficiency due to my instant love for hamburgers. My brother-in-law just grinned.
As time went on, my love for hamburgers increased. I remember a time when one of those national restaurant chains had burgers for fifteen cents and I begged my dad until I was blue in the face until he took me to this restaurant just so I could pig-out on these cheap burgers. He gave in, but was not happy about it. When he, my mom, and I got there, my dad and mom ate burgers like old pro's. Guess this is the "burger love" that my folks handed down on me when I was born. There is no other explanation.
As more time went by, I thought about cooking my own brand of hamburger and stop paying some other business to cook my favorite food. Then on one early fall Saturday afternoon, I went for it. And I had a co-pilot, my best friend, Ken "Wild Man" Stone, one of the guys I struck-up a good friendship in high school, who was visiting me on that particular Saturday.
I took the ingredients and took the burger patties out to my grill and (below) is how the Ultimate Super Burger Recipe was born. My recipe is so simple that anyone can make it, cook it and serve to family and friends.
(Depending on your family or friends)
1-3 lbs. Fresh Ground Chuck
Sliced Sharp Cheese
Roll-out Number of Burger Patties
Sprinkle Lightly Worcestershire Sauce
Apply Frank's Red Hot Sauce
(In the Middle of Each Burger)
Place Diced White Onion Bits, Hot Garden Pepper Diced
Place Diced Celery with The Other Ingredients
Place another Hamburger Patty on top of the one that you have just prepared and prepare it with the dented place in the middle with the same fixings. Then more sliced sharp cheese on top of the bun.
Make sure that the top of the hamburger bun has mustard. No catsup, unless it is called for.
You may substitute Frank's Hot Sauce on top of bun instead of catsup if you like.
⦁ Have your grill already hot before cooking. In short, cooking your burgers too fast will eliminate a lot of juicy taste from them.
⦁ Your burgers have been prepare, so now, lay burgers with half-inch space between burger patties to give each patty enough space to breathe.
⦁ Lay grill hood/plain grill over burgers but lay something over them because you have already patted them, but do not turn them now. Added cooking will add to the wonderful taste.
⦁ Turn burgers slowly, and you can choose a volunteer to try (just) a bite of one burger and let them decide. What you want are burgers that haven't cooked too long.
⦁ Makes (depending on number of guests) six to seven people.
Serve with potato chips, sweet tea, and potato salad.
Enjoy! But keep in mind that these burgers will have a tasty juice that was made by the ingredients placed in the middle of the patties. But the great taste of the burgers will be so good that you will not care.
WARNING: this is a really big cheeseburger, so do not try to eat them fast. Take your time. Like most folks, most people are satisfied with one of my Ultimate Super Cheeseburgers. Sure you can have more after you relax.
July 07, 2021_______________________________________________________
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© 2021 Kenneth Avery
Lady Dazy from UK on July 08, 2021:
Good article, but now you have made me feel hungry.