I'm a father of a 20 year old boy and have been in his life from the beginning. I've spent many fun times with my son and it payed off.
The bills are due and you’ve been working like a horse all week. You’re pretty much always tired and frequently exercising your thoughts on how to improve your family’s life. Sometimes when your kids talk to you your response is nearly unconscious; you’re not really hearing what they are saying. You are there but you aren’t there, if you know what I mean. Because of your mental and physical disadvantages, your kids can feel alone. They can feel sad, frustrated, angry, and confused. You aren’t even aware of their emotional states. Guest what? You should be. Never count yourself out.
No matter what age your kids are, fun is doable at all levels. Parents with kids in their 50s are still having fun together — walks through the mall; Farmer’s Market visits; Holiday get-togethers; cooking dates, board game days, the list goes on. Throwing a Nerf football or playing with Playdoh or barbies may be more for the younger kids, but can also be applied to an older parent - kids relationship as a way to rekindle memories growing up as a kid.
Having fun with your kids will strengthen the bond between one another and allow an evaluation of your kids as well. If there's fun being experienced consistently, say once a week or every two weeks, whenever your kids are down emotionally you can recognize it by noticing an unhealthy attitude when having fun, or trying to have fun. Having fun with your kids can help you to break the bad spirits of your kids and refresh them with a new positive energy of laughter and great conversations - it is therapeutic.
Bad relationships with your kids
If you have a bad relationship with your kids, for one, don't feel ashamed. You are not the only one. Even if you're not really a bad parent, kids like to blame us parents for their failures. I did it; my neighbors did it; even my highly influential mentor’s kid did it to her. Don't feel down on yourself and never stop parenting. When your kids are adults they'll thank you. However, try to snap out of your zombie feeling after a long day at the job. Your kids need you.
You guys will fight about decisions. Parents want their kids to go to college, but the kids would rather live with a boy/girlfriend while working as a cashier at Dairy Queens. The constant parenting of trying to get kids to do better in life can come off as annoying. People tend to neglect to hang around people who annoy them. My advice for bad relationships is to take it a bit easy on your kids. Give them a bit of freedom to make choices, and stress the consequences of those choices. Step back, and let them make mistakes. If they screw up, always be there to help them understand where they went wrong and offer guidance. If your advice works in their favor, they'll likely look more to veering towards decisions you feel are best for their lives.
Also, apologize for not being the perfect parent and give examples of why they (your kids) or a few celebrities' parents aren’t perfect. Bill Clinton and Oprah Winfrey are two of many celebs who have overcome abusive parents and have managed to make it to become two huge worldly influencers and leaders. Abusive parenting may be out of the question for your relationship with your kids, but the extremity of that type of relationship can perhaps make you appear like a saint to your kids. The point I’m making is make no excuses. Parents do the best they can in their particular situation at the time of raising their kids.
Once the kid realizes they want better, they will get better, if they truly want it and willing to work for it. The world is filled with opportunities. The blame game will get them nowhere. They must let go of resentment and free their soul of it to perhaps, if they want, become a loved celebrity. If they can’t free their soul of bitterness, then perhaps whatever they’re are looking for out of life that they aren’t getting isn't a right fit for them. If what they wanted out of life was right for them, their passion, determination, and skillset for it will surely dominate. Hold your head up high. It’s not always your fault!
When your kids stop hating you for whatever reason and start talking to you more often, in due time, encourage fun trips and events to join in on together. If you are no fun as a person, just plain out dull, don't stress it. Where there is a will there's a way. I suggest you read the following book. Many of us aren’t born fun, we have to learn how to be. And that's totally normal. If there weren't plenty of funless people in the world, surely Mandy Arioto would've written the following book, which has over 122 reviews at an average of 4 and a half stars out of five. Click here to be directed to Amazon for Have More Fun: How to Be Remarkable, Stop Feeling Stuck, and Start Enjoying Life.
You have a chance
You may think you aren’t a cool enough parent for your kids, and it might be true. Your kids rather hang out with their friends every chance they get and leave you behind cooking dinner and cleaning up their messes. That’s normal. But instead of cutting yourself short and thinking you don’t have a chance with having fun with your kids, try taking charge and picking at least one day out of the week for family time. I prefer two days a week, the more the merrier, but to each their own. Rather your relationship with your kids is positive or negative, make the dates possible even if it takes years to get a fun date with your kids. It can take time. NEVER GIVE UP. If you love your kids, any awkward feeling at the beginning of a date, because of a so-called bad relationship with your kids, is worth persisting through until the real fun begins, no matter how long it takes. Hang in there. Just remember, as long as you and your kids have life (still breathing) there is a chance to have fun together.
Boost your energy levels as a parent
It's understandable that as parents, taking care of multiple responsibilities can burn us out. Being exhausted is like the devil creeping in, negatively affecting our relationships with our kids; we are just not up to the tasks of engaging, unfortunately. The following items can help boost your energy levels so you can shake the devil off and take the bull by the horns. Let's start spending more valuable time with our kids.
- Nature Made Super B Energy Complex, Dietary Supplement for Nervous System Support, 60 Softgels, 60 Day Supply
- V8 +Energy, Healthy Drink, Natural Energy from Tea, Peach Mango, 8 Ounce Can (4 Packs of 6, Total of 24)
- Genius Mushroom – Lions Mane, Cordyceps, and Reishi – Immune System Booster & Nootropic Brain Supplement – Wellness Formula for Natural Energy, Stress Relief, Memory & Liver Support, 90 Veggie Pills
You’ll hate the future for yourself if you do not have a positive, healthy relationship with your kids. There are so many miserable, lonely adults whose kids have grown up and neglect to call or visit their parents because of the lack of time spent together when growing up. Don’t become a victim. Have fun with your kids at least once a week and you can potentially grow old sharing many enjoyable past laughs during fun times with your kids that can surely lift your spirit and brighten up your life.
Monopoly is such a classic board game; one of my favorites.