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How to Determine If One Child Is Enough for You?

Tammy Winters is an online article writer and Website Designer. When she isn't making money online, she is a State Home-care Worker.

Is one child enough?

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Is Having One Child Enough?

Determining if one child is enough or not can cause some hurt feelings in a relationship. This is a serious family issue that needs attention and discussion. Not only does the idea of having just one child affect the parents, but it also may cause hurt feelings from the only child in the family. This article is to help couples come to a solution on how they will determine if one child is enough and fix any hurt feelings or problems that may occur.

While one parent may be completely satisfied with having only one child, the other parent may be upset that their spouse doesn’t want any more kids. This relationship problem may cause a great distance between the couple. Many parents that are unhappy with just having one child will distance themselves away from their spouse and feel they have no say in the matter.

Without communicating with their spouse, this problem of only having one child will not be solved until they reach an agreement. The issue will only eat on the other parent and he/she may feel like they are not worthy enough to make and raise another child with their husband or wife.

Parents need to take in all factors and consequences of having more than one child. If you are debating on if you should have another child, you need to sit down with your spouse and communicate with each other.

Talk about what is also best for your first and only child that you have. What does your “only child” want? He or she may want a little brother or sister right now, but what happens if they don’t get what they want? What if your only child wants to have a little brother and the child turns out to be the opposite sex? Is your child going to love his/her brother or sister the same?

Your Child's Feelings Need to Be Considered

Your child’s feelings need to be taken into consideration when you and your spouse are deciding on having another child. Although the main decision is completely up to you and your spouse, you need to try to find a solution to any hurt feelings that may occur. Your child may feel all alone as an only child and would like to have someone to play with. You should explain to your only child the reasoning behind why he or she doesn’t already have a brother or sister.

Communicate With Your Spouse

Communication is a huge key factor in building strong, healthy, and happy relationships. Couples need to learn to acknowledge each other's feelings and be open to the different options of satisfying each other’s needs and wants.

There may be very important reasoning behind why one parent only wants to have one child. The other parent that wants more children needs to talk to her/his spouse to find out why they only want to have one child.

For example, maybe during the birth of the first and only child, the husband or wife had a bad experience and they don’t want to go through the same process with their next child. Maybe there are financial reasoning behind the idea of having only one child. Listen to your spouse and try to understand her or his point of view on why they only want to have one child.

There Are Other Options Than Having More Children

There are other options to consider if your husband or wife doesn’t want to have any more children. You can talk to your spouse about adopting a child. Adopting a child can ease any fear of the labor process that may have happened during the birth of your first child.
You can also babysit a baby to see if having another child is what you and your family really want. Find out how your family will react to having another child temporarily in the home. Another option to consider is finding a new family hobby that you and your family can do to ease your mind about having another child at home.

Time Will Tell

If none of the alternatives work for you or your spouse, just give it time. People change and they also change their minds. The main things to remember when there is a relationship problem or a decision needs made is communication, consideration, and patience.

This content reflects the personal opinions of the author. It is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and should not be substituted for impartial fact or advice in legal, political, or personal matters.

© 2010 Tammy Winters

Comments

Ruchi Urvashi from Singapore on December 29, 2011:

very useful information. I have one child and my husband and me both agree that our family is complete. There are some questions that rise while talking to family friends and this article is a good overview of some of the concerns that come while raising one or two kid.

jacqui2011 from Norfolk, UK on August 14, 2011:

Great hub and so true. The key is communication and talking over how you feel with your husband/partner. I waited six years after having my first child before we decided to have a second baby. Great information here. Thanks for sharing. Voted up and useful.