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Parenting a Challenging Sign
Scorpio children can be a handful. They're independent, loners, emotional, full of expression, attached to their families, and pretty strange. Scorpios need attentive parents who can embrace the full scope of their child's emotions. Scorpio children want to explore some very deep topics, they're ambitious, and they can be trouble makers.
- Scorpio children are often rebels. They like to do things their ways.
- Your child may be more emotional. They may have outbursts, anger issues, depression, or anxiety. They need reassuring parents who give direction and not too much discipline.
- The child may like villains in movies rather than the heroes.
- They may seem mature for their age and at other times amazingly immature.
- They question boundaries.
- They prefer a grounded, nourishing home over one with too much discipline.
- Expect interesting clothing choices in high school.
- Your child might do extremely well in school or poorly. Your support of them matters.
- Scorpio is constantly observing people.
- They're sensitive to the vibes people and settings give off.
- They have a deep desire to be successful.
Understanding Your Child
All Scorpios have certain things in common from their Sun sign. It may help you as a parent to better understand your child through astrology. Studying the Scorpio sign could help you to better cater your parenting style to your child or teen. Don't panic if your child is a Scorpio and you don't have a lot of experience with this sign. Scorpios may seem scary, but honestly they're some of the best children you can have. They'll love you back deeply if you give to their needs. This is someone who would make sure you're well taken care of in old age.
Scorpio is one of three signs that belong to the water element. The other two are Cancer and Pisces. Water signs focus on personal relationship, they want to express themselves deeply, they have a lot of emotional depth. The water signs can be more of the caring or empathetic types. Scorpio is very introspective and interpersonal -- they only let a select few into their most private circle. They like to watch other people and see what kind of emotions others express -- this is how they get to know someone.
Scorpio will try to push boundaries and push your buttons to see how you react. They want to know your worst emotions and fears, and they also want to know what makes you so wonderful. They're trying to figure out what makes you tick. They'll try to unmask you. They want to know if you're good or bad.
Water signs are naturally nurturing. They can be more sensitive to the reactions of others. They're drawn to the arts and music. They can be moody, restless, passionate, determined, and demanding. Scorpio knows what it wants and will demand for it. This child has high expectations of people and sometimes needs help learning to give people some space -- sometimes they also give people too much space. Scorpio children can be very demanding of their parents' or siblings' time.
Scorpio is the fixed water sign. This means your child is stubborn and likes things his way. Scorpio will fight for what he believes. He will go on the path he chooses even if it might offend or confuse others. The fixed energy causes the Scorpio to be very passionate, determined, and at times disciplined. Scorpio can be very hard on himself because of its fixed modality. Your child will strive to be the best in something; sometimes they can be blinded by their ambitions. Fixed personalities are decisive. They don't change their minds very easily. They like things to be firm, set, and for plans to be in place. Scorpio children will be offended if you constantly change plans or if you never make plans that fit their interests. It hurts their feelings when you are fickle. You better love them and not sway from that.
The Scorpio child is born in the middle of fall. It is dominated by Halloween and other related holidays. Your child may think and talk about death a lot more than your other kids. They've actually considered mortality. They're not trying to spook you, for the most part, but they do realize that everything is temporary. Since they know things are temporary, they want to try really hard to live their lives and be as passionate as possible -- or they feel drained and can barely get anything done out of depression that everything is temporary.
Your child may be intrigued by costumes and disguises. They may seem to wear a mask over themselves and try to hide from you. They're very private and will expect that you give them privacy on the regular. They sometimes feel more comfortable expressing themselves as an actor, in disguise, in a costume, or with a flashy outfit. Scorpio children sometimes put on displays like this as a way to protect themselves -- the disguise is their armor. Don't point out their clothes to them, just accept them in their armor and all. If you accept their armor, in a way you accept them.
Your child may seem sweet and sour. They'll likely want to give you love but also want to mess with you. Think of them as trying out different expressions to gain emotional understanding and charisma. Your Scorpio child will likely go back and forth on giving you treats and tricking you. A lot of Scorpio children prefer darker clothes -- deep blues, purples, blacks. They don't necessarily want to be in a bright color where everyone can see them. A lot of Scorpio children care a lot about their looks -- they may want you to invest in their fashion and hygiene more than your other children do. Scorpios can be a little materialistic.
Ruling Planet: Mars
Scorpio children are ruled by the warring planet Mars. Aries is also ruled by this planet. Your child is apt to fits, to anger, to tantrums, they want control, they want power. It's very hard as a child to have any power. Your child may try to outsmart or outmaneuver you in part because of Mars' influence.
As a parent of a Scorpio child, you should focus more so on nurturing them rather than trying to be competitive with them. A Scorpio child can have a competitive addiction, so they'll take the bait from you. Scorpio children often prefer their moms -- women often let themselves be more nurturing. Competitive parents should be careful how they rile up their Scorpio kid. Make sure you teach them how to be a good sport, how to be egalitarian, and to care about the little guys. With the right parents, a Scorpio can be a powerful force of empathy. Scorpios will gravitate to parents who: offer them more hugs and reassurance, cook them good meals, help them with chores, have self-control, are not too hard on them, and are slow to anger and quick to love.
Don't fall for a Scorpio tantrum trap. They're trying to get the worst out of you and get you to show your crazy side. Instead calmly guide them out of tantrums -- you'll win their respect this way. Scorpios are very sensitive, so if you're mean to them or discipline them too hard they'll take that to heart. This child may drive your patience, so you may have to slow down to think things through so you don't amplify the situation or chaos. It may seem like a simple singular moment, but what you do as a parent is lasting. You make up part of their inner voice as an adult.
Scorpio Children and Maturity
Scorpio children have one of the hardest paths toward maturity. They have a dense amount of emotions to discover, grow through, and master. A lot of parents give up on their Scorpio children or don't give them the attention that they deserve. Parents will cut their Scorpio kids short, which in turn can give the children mental complexes.
Scorpio children have a challenging path to face. They are the first sign in the zodiac to really encounter and recognize death. This can be very overwhelming, as you can imagine. Some parents distances themselves from their Scorpio children because they think they're weird. This is one of the worst things you can do to them. Don't let your child feel like they're a misfit in the family or unwelcome. They need to be included and invited. (A vampire won't come in your house unless you invite them, by the way.)
The child also has so many emotional expressions. Scorpio also has the most symbols attached to it -- at 3. Most of the Sun signs only have one symbol. The Scorpio will have to go through three stages in its development, the snake, the scorpion, and at last, the phoenix. Parents, you might not see your child in its last stage as this often isn't reached until adulthood, and even later adulthood.
Scorpio starts as the snake. It slithers around like a predator looking for ways to survive. The snake is cunning, it's brash, it's sneaky, and it's manipulative. The snake stage isn't very caring or kind. It's more about getting what it wants, when it wants, and making sure its plans go accordingly. The snake is very protective of its own kind, it prefers the night, it wants things cool and not too hot. The snake may keep to itself and only reveal its heart to those it really trusts. It will be important to gain the trust of your Scorpio child. They can close you out on the drop of a dime. Don't panic if they do so, respect their boundaries. Complaining that they have closed you out could potentially cause them to push you away further.
Eventually, the snake will morph into the scorpion, which isn't a great place either. The scorpion is essentially the snake but with legs and a canister of poison on its back. The scorpion is deadly, it moves quickly, and it also can be pretty mean to those that it loves. Your Scorpio child in this stage wants to show off, impress, gain power, and take on the world. It's wise to give them a good mix of competitive things to do like sports and combine that with volunteer service. Even though Scorpio has a lot of yin and feminine energy, it's also getting a ton of masculine energy from Mars. It's important as a parent to help them balance this out so they can mature and overall function. A child with a lot of Mars energy needs activity to burn through energy -- they need a parent who can direct them through their aggression. A child with a lot of yin needs a very reassuring environment -- they need a parent who can direct them through their sensitive ways. (Scorpio kids might do well to have their own garden that they can nurture. This is good for both kids who are aggressive or sensitive.)
The phoenix is a challenging stage to master. Often, Scorpios will briefly enter the phoenix stage and then cycle back to snake and scorpion. It takes time to master phoenix and stay in it for long periods of time.
The phoenix is all about sacrifice. This is someone who really cares about others and sees that to overcome existential crisis one must follow the golden rule: do to others as you would have done to you. Children are not necessarily known for their sacrificial behavior. If you want your child to grow, the Scorpio must be given chances to sacrifice and show that they care about others and even would put others above them.
This is the ultimate lesson parents of Scorpio children need to teach them: sacrifice is more important than survival. This is a lesson that's going to take a lifetime, so don't expect them to ace it in one sitting. Scorpio in the right circumstances will evolve out of the snake and scorpion -- keep in mind the Scorpio is obsessed with development, stages, and levels. In a way, Scorpio symbolizes evolution and the secrets of that to maturity.
Decorating Your Home for a Child with Water Energy
I'm a big fan of decorating your home for your family's energy. If you have a Scorpio child, you may want to have a space for them that's based in the water element. Having a home that is open to their element can help them feel more safe, accepted, and understood. They may not necessarily know that you are trying to build a home that fits their personality and needs.
- Try adding water fountains, snow globes, or water like features into your home. Fountains outside where your child can be in nature is a good idea.
- Children do well to go outside and learn from the elements. A Scorpio child will enjoy having a pond where they can watch fishes, a creek that they can play in, a window or screened in porch where they can watch rain or snow.
- Take Scorpio children out to rivers, lakes, or the beach to get some fresh air and to watch the waves.
- Inside your home, try adding a fish bowl or aquarium. Scorpios will enjoy having pets: fish, insects, lizards, and birds all go along with their journey's path.
- Scorpios also love cats and dogs. Scorpios sometimes shut out people, so it's a good idea to have a pet where they can feel more comfortable. Having a pet can also teach them responsibility and how to nurture something.
- Add more mirrors into your home. Water is about reflection, so mirrors can mimic that. Mirrors can help with the flow of energy. Your child might be a little vain too, and would like to see their face from time to time.
- In Feng Shui, color is one of the easiest ways to bring energy into a room. To bring in a more water feel, paint a wall blue.
- Water energy does well in the north area of your home.
- Add in more furniture or other items with a blue color to help with the energy. Blue accessory pillows, rugs, towels, and window shades could also help to bring out water energy.
- Light fixtures could also help bring out that water vibe: add in lamps that remind you of the ocean, figurines of mermaids, or lamps made of shells.
- Ships in bottles, navigational items, globes, and the like.
- Also, consider having a rain stick or rain noise in your home to help create the right vibe for your child. Adding in more water can be soothing to them.
- Add antique blue glass in the kitchen and in other places. Little signatures of blue can help you get the vibe you desire in your home.
- Add black and white pictures to your walls or watercolor paintings. Black color accessories can also give off a hint of the water element.
- Add pictures of water landscapes to your home as well. Black can help give a more masculine or yang feel to water energy, blue can give a more feminine or yin feel.
- Sharp and straight angles go with yang, curves go with yin. Water overall is more of a yin energy. It's best not to add more water Feng Shui into a bathroom as it already has a lot of water features.
Study the Water Element in Tarot
In Tarot, the water element is symbolized by the house of cups. The cups from Ace to King go on a path through emotional development. With a Scorpio, it will be key to follow their emotional development and help them grow into a kind, wise, and well-tempered adult. Your child will likely go through dozens of moods as they mature from child, teen, to adult. They'll need parents who can reassure them and give them direction, parents who are sensitive and kind, and parents who recognize them for their unique talents.
Understanding Scorpio through Tarot: Suit of Cups
|Cards||Description||Meaning for Child|
Ace of Cups
Indicates new beginnings
Your child may be drawn to new ideas, happiness, and relationships. They're drawn to success.
Two of Cups
Duality / two hearts or two minds coming together
Your child is drawn to having strong relationships with others. They are also courageous, loyal, and passionate.
Three of Cups
Dancing, friendship, merriment
Your child is drawn to activity and celebration. Scorpio children are known for their connection to Halloween.
Four of Cups
A young man sits under a tree and is contemplative.
A period of boredom and where nothing seems of interest. Your child may go through periods of inactivity where their emotions become distilled. They may need a moment to reset.
Five of Cups
Three cups are knocked to their side; two cups still stand.
Your child will have to confront disappointment or loss, and you'll need to direct them toward still appreciating what they do have and the opportunities still before them.
Six of Cups
Two youths play in a garden surrounded by 6 cups.
Your child will hold onto memories and nostalgia.
Seven of Cups
A youth sees seven cups in the clouds with different fortunes and misforuntes.
Your child will encounter many different kinds of choices and must take the time to understand them. Your child has the power to take control of their emotions with the right guide.
Eight of Cups
Eight cups arranged in a row. A figure leaves them behind.
Sometimes we have to go on journeys into the unknown. Your child will grow by going after new and unknown things. They can't always stay with what they do know.
Nine of Cups
A well-fed, satisfied person sits with 9 cups behind him.
Your child has the power to make their wishes come true. They should be careful about what they wish to happen.
Ten of Cups
A husband and wife join arms. A rainbow is over their house.
Your child is definitely attuned to its family. Scorpios are some of the biggest relationship seekers. Scorpio desires to be a in a passionate relationship with a strong family.
Page of Cups
A youth holds a cup and fish pokes out of it.
Your child has insight and intuition. They would do well to study art, poetry, and music.
Knight of Cups
A knight offers a cup.
Sensitive, seeking, romantic, chivalry.
Queen of Cups
A woman sits on a throne.
She is intuitive and gives good advice.
King of Cups
A king holding a scepter floats on water.
Someone who is wise, tempered, balanced, and kind. This is the ultimate goal for Scorpio.
This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.
Andrea Lawrence (author) from Chicago on December 31, 2020:
Scorpio children can be tough, but they also make for fantastic adult children who are pretty devoted.
Heidi Thorne from Chicago Area on December 31, 2020:
My poor parents! :) But because I'm on the cusp, I think it tempered the most extreme of the traits. Thanks for the insight!