As a teacher, I taught students to keep their lives disciplined.I told them it would help them to face any eventuality and achieve succes.
The upbringing of children is a very holistic and important aspect of life. It is the most important duty of all parents.
We must execute it in a very scientific and planned-out mode. Parents have to carefully oversee and guide them throughout their childhood.
The parents, teachers and schools have a great role to play in it. All the elders must know the modes of good and bad parenting.
They should be aware of the red flags signs that warn they are proving themselves to be bad parents. The border line separating good and bad parenting is very delicate and thin.
The children form good or bad behaviour by what they observe and learn from their parents and elders around them. So, good parenting is absolutely necessary.
They mimic and copy the actions of their parents, who are their first role models. So it is the foremost duty of all elders to check and prune their own actions. Else these children will be prone to bad parenting.
The next influencers are their school teachers and peers. As they grow they are more influenced by the activities going about in their childhood garden.
Good or bad parenting behaviours by teachers, guardians, and their peers shape the corresponding good and bad quality in them.
Children pick up bad manners and actions more easily. So, parents mustn't wrongly protect their children's offensive actions. This is gross bad parenting.
During ancient times, in India, parents sent their children to the abodes of teachers, or gurus as it addressed them in those times. These schools were, in fact, boarding schools.
The societies knew them as ‘gurukuls’. In such schools, children from peasants to the royal families went and learned the lessons of life.
The teachers nurtured them in a holistic environment, away from their parents.
But when some teachers weren't good they imbibed all the evils of bad and scheming guardians.
Here they taught the children from academics, social lives, warfare, to scriptures, and all related skills. When they left the schools these teens were mature citizens.
They were ready to engage in their duties towards society and family. But some of these new adults also picked up the evils prevalent there.
Nowadays, schools prepare students to choose their careers and move ahead in life.
But affluent parents and guardians hype and pamper their kids to a great extent.
So the teachers keep a distance from them out of fear. In reality, these children boss over the school teachers and staff.
This happens due to the possessiveness of their rich parents.
Such uncaring parents instruct the school administration not to harass their kids. Thus these kids go astray.
They become fearless and pick up all evil habits. They also influence their peers with money power that's provided to them in abundance.
These teens, thus inculcate all the negative influences from an early age, from their homes themselves.
These negative formations proved extremely costly when such children become adults.
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Parenting the child is a very dedicated and holistic work for all parents. But usually, its approach goes haywire.
Nowadays, many parents have no time for their children. They are busy with their duties of earning for the family. These are examples of bad parenting.
Both the parents work to live comfortably. They leave home in the morning and return late in the evening. During this time the kids are in the care of either babysitters, maids, or at the creche.
This is gross negligence to your parents' duty. It is an example of careless and bad parenting.
This problem is most severe with kids belonging to celebrities, and the high strata of society. They have neither the time nor willingness to guide their children. Such kids are certain to go haywire.
These kids get time to meet their parents only once in a blue moon, But generally, the following types of parenting styles are prevalent in society:
- Authoritarian Parenting
- Authoritative Parenting
- Permissive Parenting
- Uninvolved Parenting
- Poor Parenting
Authoritarian parents are a stickler for rules. They convey clearly that what they say must be obeyed and followed without a whimper. The children aren’t given any hearing.
Authoritative parents create and maintain a positive relationship with their kids. They enforce all rules. They clarify the consequences of non-compliance and let them self-learn.
Permissive parents are those that take on the roles of friendly parents. They set rules but allow escape routes. They believe that their children will learn through trial and error modes.
Uninvolved parents are such who have the least knowledge about their children. They don’t know in whose companionship their children move about with or their daily deeds.
They don’t set up or enforce rules. Such kids receive minimal parental attention, guidance, or nurturing. Parents are unaware of the child's progress. They are busy with their daily schedule.
Bad parents are those whose actions and behavior harm the kids more than ever. They don’t care what their children are doing or up to. They encourage them in every deed.
They don’t have time for them at all. The rich and celebrity parents think that giving their children freedom and money will solve the problems of upbringing.
Today the hype in the media adds to the cause of poor and bad parenting by many people.
Teens are influenced by the media. They try to achieve the heights of glory as shown.
The parents egg them on. This only leads to failures in life later. This is proof of unattentive, poor, and bad parenting.
The glare and effects of the media are astoundingly great, on the rich and celebrities' kids. It also affects other families and children.
Every news regarding these celebrities and their children becomes breaking news. The hype creates a ripple on other teens thoughts.
They media chases celebrities and their kids around with shutterbugs, clicking at every moment.
They report their daily life, girlfriends or boyfriends, their dress, and every silly gossip. Such media activities influences young minds badly.
The celebrities' kids are transformed into celebrities even before they achieve that status. Such undue attention mostly has negative effects not only on the star kids but others also.
The parents feel proud of the media attention their kids get. They feel that the immense fame, wealth, and property they have accumulated will make their children celebrities also.
Hence their parenting becomes unattentive, careless, and haywire.
It leads their children more on the path of swagger, pride, alcohol, drugs, and destruction.
It also destroys other kids and teens lives in a big way.
Influences of Bollywood and Hollywood
The tinsel world is a source of attraction for all the teens, youths, and even grown-up kids.
All want to make a career there and make it big, with name, fame, and money.
The case of celebrity kids is no different. They are certain that their famed parents will open the gates of stardom and fame for them.
All celebrity parents go all out to shape their children careers. This mostly proves harmful.
It also leads other teens in that direction. Their parents have neither kept a check on them nor guided them properly. They thus prove themselves as careless and bad parents.
Many parents dream of their children entering the tinsel world of Bollywood or Hollywood.
The celebrity parents themselves always live a carefree life. Whatever they desire, their directors, producers, and middlemen fulfill them.
So, when they themselves live in such a way, they don't care to put any curb on their kid's needs. These parents are usually a mix of:
- · Permissive
- · Uninvolved
They don’t have time to check their children’s progress at home, school, or social gatherings. They admit their children to the best schools and colleges.
The parents employ some people to cater to their kids' fees, expenses, and pocket money. The parents don't have any time for their children.
It is doubtful if they even have time to glance at the kid's terminal or annual progress at school. They get information about the child's progress through their employees.
It’s perfectly okay for them. They never care to crosscheck any details themselves. Again this is gross negligence and bad parenting.
The children of such aristocratic societies' guardians and parents know their celeb parents' attitudes and thought-process.
So they manipulate things and enjoy life. But later suffer when they enter their teens and adulthood.
Then such parents understand their mistakes, but it is too late in the day. These are examples of gross bad parenting.
Teens get trapped and entangled in this tinsel web, and become addicted to alcohol, pubs, bars, and drugs.
The resultant upbringing of many youngsters is evident. The reasons are due to bad, improper, and careless parenting. Thus, these teens' lives go haywire.
Call To Action
The reasons for kids' lives going haywire are clear. It is simply due to bad and uncaring parenting.
These business tycoons, producers, directors, politicians, and star parents are hell-bent on making their children as celebrated as they are.
Politicians and business tycoons are successful to a great extent. But many of the kids become polished schemers. This occurs because of bad parenting.
This is simply due to bad parenting, with doses of permissive and uninvolved attitudes. The best parents are authoritarian ones but who carefully mix necessary doses of authoritative punch.
If one looks into the lives of many star kids like Aryan Khan, Navya Navelli Nanda, Sara Ali Khan, the result is visible.
These star kids have no qualms about alcohol, drugs, mutual sexual relationships. They regularly go to pubs, gyms, beaches, parties to enjoy and thus lend gossip and photos to shutterbugs.
Their parents also feel proud of such undesired, silly attitudes. Instead of pressing their brakes, they press their accelerator and allow them to zoom ahead.
This support gives these rich kids wings. It leads them to unwanted, dangerous rave parties where all kinds of drugs and alcohol flow freely. Sex during such times is a common agenda.
Therefore, they fall into the net of government narcotics teams and learn the hard way.
Other teens who see them try to mimic them and also pay a heavy price in their lives.
But decent and disciplined learnings will come only if the parents put their hands on their throats and take control.
But by that time, such children are beyond the control of any parent.
The celebrity and high society parents' careless attitudes towards their children prove them to be very bad parents.
Similar is the state of middle-class and lower class societies children whose parents don't find time for them.
All childrens' role models today are Bollywood and Hollywood stars or sports stars. They copy and mimic them to the hilt.
But they don’t research or look into the tragic lives of some sports, Bollywood, or Hollywood star kids, or other stars. Neither they learn nor their parents motivate them to learn lessons from it.
There is a proverb that Rome was not built in a day. Similarly, it takes time, full focus, and dedication to build one's status. One needs to sweat it out hard to gain success.
Every parent must understand their responsibility in the upbringing of their children.
They must stand by their sides during their childhood periods. They must prove themselves good, caring parents.
They must instill good behavior and attitude in them. They have to prove themselves exemplary parents who care for their children.
They always have to be ready as their guides, teachers, and protectors. They shouldn't pamper them with abundant money, and undue protection. Then they are proving to be bad parents.
They are only destroying their lives before they bloom. So be aware!
This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.
© 2021 Bharat Sharan