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Bad Babysitter - Short Funny Stories


I am a great auntie and wonderful babysitter. Notice how I didn't say I'm a mother. No, being an aunt is different. I can spend as much time as I like with my nieces or nephews but at the end of the day I go home to a quiet house where the only person I have to take care of is myself.

I get to see the kids at the best of times but when I'm babysitting sometimes I get to see them at the worst of times. And I I a bad babysitter for letting the kids run me over and get to do whatever they want.

My stories have been throughout the years; some early on before I became an aunt. I completed the babysitting course when I was 13 and started babysitting right after that. When I was a teenager, you could understand being a bad babysitter, but as an adult, we have to wonder.

The Only Child

When I was 16 I babysat this one seven year old boy who was stubborn and rambunctious. One night I was sitting on floor and behind me was an armchair. What do you think happened? Of course I looked like a part of the furniture so he climbed over the chair and jumped over my head. This seemed okay the first time so I didn't say anything. He was having fun. Then he did it again. And again and faster. Then crash. I looked at his collapsed body sprawling on the floor.

My hair barrette scraped his leg. So here I am, the bad babysitter, who allowed the boy to run over me literally. When the parents came home, I ended up going home in a police car.

* * * * *

Okay, so the father was a police officer so that made sense. I was worried I was the bad babysitter but in the end no one got reprimanded. The boy was told he should jump on his babysitter but in reality he knew he could do whatever he wanted. That was the "Aha" moment for me when I discovered the "only child syndrome."

Two Aunties and a Baby

I was given the great pleasure as an auntie to babysit my 4 week old niece. Now of course I wouldn't be able to do this job alone so both aunts got involved. Two aunts, one baby.

Babies are pretty easy to babysit because they don't do much. You watch them, hold them, take them places. They just go wherever you go and the most important part is keeping them safe. So the aunts decided to take the 4 week old baby for a walk in the stroller. We headed down the street and before we knew it, it was dark. We were blocks from home in a questionable neighbourhood.

Luckily I lived close, so we went to my place. The hard part wasn't actually babysitting but the phone call to our sister to tell her that her baby daughter wasn't at home. She took it pretty well and came to pick up my niece at my house.

When they got home, the worst part of being two bad auntie babysitters wasn't the fact that we were stranded. We didn't even lock the door at home!

The Happy Toddler

I volunteered to babysit for friends one day so they could go apartment hunting baby free. I arrived to babysit and it was perfect. He was sleeping. So the parent left and I was given lots of instructions on his snacks, drinks, toys, and TV.

Not even five minutes after the parents left the apartment, he wakes up. I go to the crib and he's smiling and talking to himself. He sees me and is happy to be taken out of his crib. He drinks his water bottle and is playing and laughing in no time. He's eating his snacks and running around from the rooms. Jumping on his parents bed (which was pre-approved as a play option). It was going great!

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We're playing ball and he's walking funny. I watch as he stops, sits down and finds the cereal snack that's stuck to his foot. He's such a good toddler and I'm amazed that he can do so much independently. He picks off the cereal from his foot and I'm thrilled he figured it out. Bu then he pops it directly in his mouth. Yikes, I am horrified! I am sitting there in shock; not sure what to do. This wasn't the 10 second rule. This snack was stuck on his foot!

Too late! The bad babysitter let the toddler eat yucky dirty food. Ugh!

Now that's a bad babysitter

Babysitter Instructions

Who: Two beautiful, quiet girls. Three years old and six years old.

Babysitter Instructions: "There's candy on the table that the girls can eat and you can order pizza for dinner. Let them play with the iPad for as long as they want and watch TV. You don't have to do anything. The computer's there with internet for you. They'll just watch TV until they get tired and fall asleep wherever they are. You don't have to put them to bed or even really watch them. Thanks for babysitting!"

I almost burst out laughing.


Rochelle Ann De Zoysa from Moratuwa, Sri Lanka on February 22, 2020:

Interesting stories :) When I babysit my younger cousins had to keep them occupied with arts and crafts. Games and listening :)

CrisSp from Sky Is The Limit Adventure on December 03, 2012:

Lol! Very funny! So, there you go, your easy "do-it-themselves" baby sitting instructions as per your closing statement. Ha...ha...ha...gotta share this with my girl who love kids and baby sitting.

Thanks. Voted up, funny and sharing.

J.Martinez on August 24, 2012:

I really hope your not looking for a babysitting job

emmy1980 from North Carolina on August 24, 2012:

LMAO! Love the instructions at the end.

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