Anamika S. Jain has been a social media consultant for six years. She has written more than 200 articles on relationships and dating.
Should Parents choose the Career of their children?
Parenting is an enormous responsibility. Children are like clay and Parents are like a Potter who gives shape to his creations. A Parent can make or break a child. Parents are said to have the best interests of their children in mind, yet many times they end up ruining the lives of their children with their choices. Every Parent wants his or her child to be successful in life by choosing an appropriate career. It is true that Parenting can be extremely demanding, and one learns by trial and error. Many times Parents force their opinions and choices on their children without considering what they want. Sometimes these mistakes of Parents can ruin their son/daughters life instead of improving them.
Should Parents enforce their career choices onto their child? Why do parents force their choices on kids? I am trying to give the answers to these questions through this Hub.
Given below are some common reasons why Parents may force their career choices on children.
Should Parents Force Career Choices Onto Their Children?
Parents play a vital role in the career planning of their children. Many times Parents force career choices on children:
- Because they want to see their dreams fulfilled through Children: We often see Parents who force their children to be a ‘Doctor’ or engineer’ because that is what they wanted personally but could not become. So they look upon their children for fulfilling their own unfulfilled dreams.
- Because the career choice is prestigious or rewarding: Sometimes Parents insist their children to opt for a Career because there is a lot of scope in it. Maybe it could be a career with a large pay packet too.
- Because the neighbor’s son/daughter is doing it: Sometimes pressure from Parents to choose a career could be because someone they know is doing it. So they consider it is a prestige issue for their offspring to do it too.
- Because it is a family thing: It is quite natural for Parents to expect their children to opt for a career majority of family members are in. For instance, a Businessman may expect his son to handle his business than go for an alternate career of his choice. Likewise, there are families where the male members are mostly lawyers or doctors. So it is quite natural for Parents to expect that their son would also choose it as a career.
- Because they think that is the best choice for their children: What the parents may think is best for their children may not always be the best for them. But if the assumption is made based on the abilities or interest, then it could be a wise choice.
What many of the overambitious parents do not realize is that forcing a child to pursue a career of your own choice which he/she has no interest on can often result in failure and disappointment. The Career of a person plays a large role in his/her happiness. Parents should try to be a guide to the children and help him/her in weighing the pros and cons of various careers. It is noticed that when people do things which they like and enjoy, they excel in what they do. Therefore, let you child choose a career which he/she wants based on their interest, aptitude, intelligence and personality.
Should Parents interfere in the Career choices of their children? Please share your opinions by way of comments.
© Copyright Anamika S Jain, All Rights Reserved.
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Usman Suri on November 27, 2014:
Although sometimes parents choice of career don't comes out to be good but this doesn't mean that they are selfish. If they were, they would never advise rather they'll let you be even a home maid
Grace Marguerite Williams from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York on September 21, 2014:
This is a succinct article indeed. So many people are in jobs that they dislike, even hate because their parents told them that this was the "right" job/career for them. So many parents believe that they know "what is best" because of their years of experience. However, your children's interests and forte may be divergently different from yours and such differences should be encouraged.
Parents who choose their children's careers for them will have children who will end up hating the parents because they are not living authentic, true lives. Parents must realize that they can't live vicariously through their children. If they want that goal then THEY , not their children, should achieve that goal. To force a child to live a parent's unfulfilled dream is selfishness to the utmost degree!
Ruchi Urvashi from Singapore on July 30, 2012:
I think parents need to guide and provide information to children and let them decide their own career. It will be good for both children and parents. Good article.
Traci from North Carolina on July 29, 2012:
I am going to send my kids to school and hope they make the best career choice for them to be happy. But, I do believe parents are a little pushy. Just because they are your children doesn't mean they will like the same career path. =) Great hub
fjohn from india on July 07, 2012:
great insights from you anamika........... thanks.
Sharilee Swaity from Canada on May 15, 2012:
Anamikas, such an important topic! Yes, parents can ruin the life of the child by their own selfishness and by not accepting the choices that the child wants to make. What good is a career if it is done only because the parents want it? Voted up, more and sharing!
raciniwa from Talisay City, Cebu on March 14, 2012:
In so many ways the parents are ruining their children's lives by not being the role model...a very useful hub...
sord87 on March 09, 2012:
When they are still young from 1-7 years old,parents can take in charge of all their needs,whenever they grow up teenager,their opinion being accounted for in the family.That is what most parents leftover when bringing up their children.
NJ Blake from United States on March 09, 2012:
There's a big gap between "force" and encouragement. It's a competitive world and the experience and wisdom that comes over the years can provide great advice - but that's a long way from being forcefully pushy!
The Frog Prince from Arlington, TX on March 09, 2012:
My answer is a resounding "NO." My ex-wife kept pushing on my son to become this or that. My reply was to let him figure it out for himself. It's best to have a career that you enjoy and not one to make your parents happy. To each his own.
AS on March 08, 2012:
Are Parents ruining the life of their children by forcing career choices? Answer is yes, ONLY if child is a gifted one. Otherwise child is better of learning from parent's experiences to jump-start his life.
Debra Allen from West By God on March 08, 2012:
Pinned it for you!
Deepak Chaturvedi from New Delhi, India on March 08, 2012:
Nice hub and subject has well chosen. Most of the time it is found,children get success in the field of their interest but they often get fail to achieve the goal set by their parents.
JR Krishna from India on March 08, 2012:
Today's children are well informed and take decisions on their own much early in life.
Voted up and sharing
Debra Allen from West By God on March 07, 2012:
Awesome! I couldn't pin it because you don't have a picture at the top.
Sunita-Sharma from Los Angeles,California,US on March 07, 2012:
Very nice article...I think any child will do his best in the area what interests him more rather than an area or field forced on him.
JS Matthew from Massachusetts, USA on March 07, 2012:
One thing I have learned while raising teenagers is that you can't force anything on them! You can try but it leads to resistance. I like to make suggestions to them as to what they should do but remind them they are their own person and will have to live with the consequences of their decisions. As they say, you can lead a horse to the water, but you can't make them drink! Great Hub! Up and SHARED!
Bill Holland from Olympia, WA on March 07, 2012:
An interesting hub written from India but could easily have been written in the United States. A difficult subject and you handled it beautifully!
Oyewole Folarin from Lagos on March 07, 2012:
Forcing our own career choices on the children in most cases will not do them any good, unless we go according to their own special interest which we let them build upon.
earnoncomputer from India on March 07, 2012:
Yes, the parents should never force their choice on their children. They should only give the options to them with their merits and demerits and keeping in view the children's strengths, weeknesses and also their hobby.
Cindi from Parkersburg on March 07, 2012:
Very informative. Insightful information. My son is only 16. I wanted my son to become a pharmacist. He wanted no part in it. He has decided he wants a career in graphic design. If it's what will make him happy, then I'm happy with it.
jacqui2011 from Norfolk, UK on March 07, 2012:
Great article and well written. I believe that parents should support the choices of their child when planning their careers. At this point, it is the start of their working lives and I think that they should make their own choices and do something that they want to do. All we can do is be there to support and guide them. Very interesting article - voted up.
iamaudraleigh on March 07, 2012:
This could be useful for me today :) Well done...voted up!