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A Guide to Unique Parenting: Learn How to Be A Better Parent

a-guide-to-unique-parenting-learn-how-to-be-a-better-parent

What does it mean to be a good parent?
The best way to be a good parent is to be a good person. That doesn’t mean you’re a perfect parent, or that you always make the right decisions. It just means that you try your best, and have your child’s best interest in mind. It’s really that simple. Being a good parent means showing your child compassion and empathy. It means having a strong and healthy relationship with them, so they can feel safe and loved. It also means providing them with a safe environment to live in, so they can explore and learn without feeling anxious or scared. Being a good parent also means giving your child healthy boundaries, and consistent and predictable rules and expectations. It means giving them the freedom to make their own mistakes, and learn from their failures. It means giving them the freedom to be themselves, so they can discover and explore their unique gifts and talents.

Why is being a good parent so hard?
As we mentioned above, being a good parent is hard because it requires us to be good people. It requires us to be patient, and loving, and compassionate, and empathetic, and all these other ‘-ives’ that aren’t easy to be on a consistent basis. Parenting is hard because it’s a 24/7 job with no real end date. It’s hard because it requires us to set boundaries and create structure in a world where those things aren’t often respected or honoured. It’s hard because it often means saying ‘no’ to our children when we really want to say ‘yes’. It’s hard because it means setting healthy boundaries and limits, without making our children feel unloved or insignificant.

Disciplinary techniques that work
When disciplining a child, it’s important to remember that the goal is not to punish them or make them feel bad about what they’ve done. The goal of discipline is to help a child understand what they did was wrong, and not let them make the same mistake again. Disciplinary techniques that actually work: - Focus on the behaviour, not the child - Discipline should focus on the specific behaviour that your child did, not who they are as a person. Say things like, “You broke the rule about not playing with the dog’s food,” rather than, “You’re so stupid for doing this!” - Make it clear what the child did wrong - Your child needs to know what they did wrong in order to understand why they’re being disciplined. If they don’t understand why they’re being disciplined, they won’t be able to avoid making the same mistake in the future. - Make it clear what the child should have done instead - Your child needs to understand what they should have done instead of what they did. If they don’t understand what they should have done, they won’t be able to avoid making the same mistake in the future.

a-guide-to-unique-parenting-learn-how-to-be-a-better-parent

Communication techniques that work
- Be mindful of your tone - When you discipline your child, it’s important to do it with a calm and patient tone. Yelling at your child will only cause them to shut down, and make them feel even less loved and accepted than they already do. - Be mindful of your words - When you discipline your child, it’s important to do it with clear and concise words. Avoid using words like “always” and “never”, because no one is perfect, and your child isn’t expected to be. - Be mindful of your silence - Sometimes the best thing you can do to discipline your child is say nothing at all. Sometimes the best thing you can do is simply walk away, and let your child think about what they’ve done, and why it was wrong.

Behavioural modification techniques that work
Behavioural modification is a type of ‘positive’ discipline that focuses not on punishing a child for doing something wrong, but rewarding them for doing something right. - Be consistent - If you want to use behavioural modification with your child, then you need to be consistent in your praise, and your discipline. If you promise to give your child one hour of screen time per day, then you need to be consistent in enforcing that rule. - Use a rewards chart - If you want to use a rewards chart with your child, you can start by rewarding them for doing things like getting all their homework done on time, making their bed every day, and helping around the house with chores. You can also use rewards charts to help your child work through their behavioural issues. - Use natural consequences - If you want to use natural consequences with your child, you need to make sure they understand the connection between their actions and the consequences that arise from them.

Bottom line
Being a good parent is no easy task, and it’s something that every parent wants to be. It doesn’t happen overnight, and it doesn’t happen with just one ‘right’ way of doing things. It happens when we put in the effort and love and patience needed to be a good parent. But it’s worth it.

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