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Movie Review: Orphan First Kill

Elijah is an Amazon best-selling author, blogger, previous columnist for an award-winning blog, past creative editor, socialite & traveler.

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Plot *Spoiler Alert*

Leena is a woman posing as a child because of a rare disease, using this is a weapon she escapes an Estonian mental hospital in a violent tirade and assumes the identity of a missing girl from the United States, Esther Albright. She finds her on a missing children's page and finds herself to have an uncanny resemblance. She decides to prey on the family's gullibility and mourning in order to manipulate them so she can mooch off their money.

When she reconnects with her long, lost "family", everything seems to be going well until there are minor discrepancies. For example: she doesn't remember that her grandmother passed and she also mistakes the therapist's parrot for another. Her counselor voices her concerns to Tricia and claims that she is, "acting."

She settles into her new family and there is tension between her and her brother, Gunnar, and sexual tension between her "father", who is an avid painter like Leena. It's all strange and confusing but lowkey ship them rather than horrible Tricia.

It becomes apparent to the detective on their case that Esther is not who she claims to be, but she kills him before he can expose her. However, Tricia comes in and finishes him off as it turns out that she knew all along that Esther wasn't her daughter because the real Esther had been dead for many years, and her body had been dumped in the well on their property. They decide to keep the pretending because it mutually benefits them; Esther will mooch off the family financially and be taken care of, while Allen will be more himself and recover from the loss, and in extension be a better father and husband. This goes sour fast as Gunnar's psychopathic side comes out and him and his mother constantly degrade her, ESPECIALLY after she made a subtle move on her husband. Gunnar and Tricia conspire together and they poison her dinner, but Esther who isn't hungry decides to give it to her pet mouse who later dies. She puts the dead mouse at the bottom of the blender in Tricia's smoothie as a warning and I was so glad she did because that bitch deserved it.

When it all begins to boil, Tricia and Gunnar decide that it is finally time to kill Esther and to make it look like a suicide (but why the fuck would a nine year old kill herself especially after being so happy and content? It wouldn't make sense and would raise red flags so it was really a stupid plan on their part). A fight breaks out and in the process Gunnar is stabbed to death with his fencing equipment and the house catches fire. Tricia and Esther are on the roof trying to kill each other when Allen returns home and races into the house to save them. While holding onto both of their hands, Allen lets go of Tricia and she falls to her death; smashing her head on the sidewalk. Definitely the best part of the film! Then the jig is up and Allen discovers Esther's true identity before falling to his death as well.

Orphan: First Kill Trailer

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Characters

So, to make it short; the main characters are incredibly unlikable. Esther, shockingly, was the best character and the least shady of all, and oddly enough I was routing for her the entire film.

Starting with Tricia, she is by far the WORST character. A shady, pretentious "mother" (I say that lightly because she covered up her daughter's death and dumped her corpse... seriously, how could a mother do that?), who has lots of dirt and a shocking secret. Her cruelty and blackmailing of Esther is horrible, and I cannot get passed the fact that she so selfishly protected her son from getting in legal trouble over the real Esther's death. Was she trying to protect her family's name? I think so. I don't think it was ever about protecting Gunner, I think it was to protect the family's pedigree. She's truly psychopathic and dead inside and I was very happy when she fell off the roof and split her head open on the sidewalk below. Yeah, I know that's blunt.

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Gunnar is a sniveling little rich boy with a sense of entitlement and full of excuses. He relies on mommy to get him out of trouble and has no remorse for what he's done. When he talked about killing the real Esther to Leena he says it in a way that makes me wonder; did he kill Esther on purpose? He got his just desserts in the end. Also, what a dumb and stereotypical name for a rich brat. I would've killed him for the name alone!

Allen is the husband and although he's very gullible, naïve, and lying to himself about his daughter, he's very likable... and hot! He loves to paint and has a soothing and calm demeanor. Seriously, why is he with that bitch? I was very sad to see him go.

Lastly, Esther. In the first film she was seriously cruel and demented and there was nothing likable about her. In fact, I think we all rejoiced when Kate kicked her and broke her neck and she sunk to the bottom of the pond. However, in this film she's more likable, aside from massacring poor staff at the Estonian hospital, and lying to mooch off a grieving family. It then becomes apparent that she is the lesser of the evils (in my opinion). Again, to cover up your own daughter's murder, who was only five years old, and dump her corpse down a well like trash is so, so unspeakably abominable. I'm so glad Esther put a dead rat at the bottom of her smoothie. Toward the middle point and on to the end of the film I was routing for her to off Tricia and Gunnar.

Esther

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Image does not belong to me

Tricia

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Gunnar

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Allen

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Review

Well, I was looking forward to this movie, however I don't think it beats the first Orphan film. There were some things that really annoyed me. For example, I really wish they explained more about how their real daughter died. Tricia said it was accidental and Gunnar was playing too rough but I feel as though Gunnar purposely murdered her. It would bring clarification (and entertainment) to know how exactly she "died". It would also be interesting to learn of how Tricia covered up the entire thing. I also don't see how/why Tricia and Gunnar reacted so well to her coming home knowing full well that the real Esther had been dead and in a well for year. Also, why didn't Allen ever suspect that his daughter was actually dead. Were there any signs of foul play? Did he recognize his wife and son acting differently? And why didn't police search the premises. I'm sure police dogs could sniff it out. And the family was never under investigation? Things don't seem to make sense. Also, the timeline doesn't add up and is inconsistent with the first Orphan movie. And, why wasn't Esther taken in by another family member when the Albrights died? They wouldn't have stuck her in an orphanage or a foster home, she would've gone to a family member. And wouldn't police investigate the remains? I'm sure they would've found knife wounds on Gunnar's remains even if they were badly burned. And if that were the case, wouldn't Esther be arrested? Then there would be no way for her to get adopted by the Colemans years later. The Albright's money was also left to her in the will so why would she even need to be adopted? Wouldn't the next adoptive family find it odd that she has a bank account with likely millions of dollars? It all seems inconsistent and nonsensical and there is no way she'd go under the radar undetected.

For these reasons I have to give it 3 stars.

Rating

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© 2022 Elijah DeVivo

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