Skip to main content

Casually Chasing Bigfoot Is My Dream Job

  • Author:
  • Updated date:

My Dream Job

When I was a kid, I had many different thoughts about what I wanted to be when I grew up. I'm pretty sure they included things like astronaut, baseball pitcher, actor, writer (yay!), aeronautical engineer, robotics expert, race car driver, police detective and fighter pilot. As I've grown older, many of these dreams have fallen by the wayside and I've come to accept, in the lyrics of Charlie Daniels, that "You ain't never gonna be nuthin' but what you are." Imagine my surprise, at over 50 years old, to finally see my true dream job.

I was watching a show called "Expedition Bigfoot" because I love bigfoot. Not in a creepy, stalker kind of way, but more in a giggly fan boy kind of way. I watch everything about bigfoot, and the Loch Ness monster, and aliens and ghosts and freaky ranches and pretty much anything else "Unexplained". A little background here--I've had very little in the way of paranormal experiences myself, but I am extremely open-minded and willing to believe, if anything paranormal ever chooses to visit me. Anyway, the show had the usual setup, with a group of folks gearing up and heading off into the woods to look for the big guy. Except one of those folks didn't go into the woods. Meet my hero, holder of my dream job, Bryce Johnson.

There's More Than One Way to Catch a Bigfoot

Bryce didn't walk out into the woods with the others. Bryce, instead, went to "Bigfoot HQ", which is another term for a luxury cabin with 4 big screen TV's, a fireplace and nachos. Okay, the nachos are an assumption on my part, but how could you not have nachos with that setup? So, while his co-adventurers are out in the woods, risking life and limb, sleeping on the ground, picking ticks off of themselves and getting covered with ape pheromones, Bryce has got their back. He is standing by with a weather report, an update on forest fires, or to say the magic words "I'll check into that."

Some classic Bryce scenes:

Field researcher Russell finds a possible bigfoot hair and Bryce offers to get it to a lab to analyze it. As Russell rappels down a rocky mountain slope to get to the drop point, Bryce adjusts the air conditioning in his jeep and leisurely drives in Russell's direction.

Field researchers Ronny and Mireya fear for their safety, apparently surrounded by bigfoots (bigfeet?) in the woods while Bryce sits on somebody's back porch interviewing an eyewitness about their bigfoot encounter (and presumably sipping iced tea).

Scroll to Continue

Russell dangles from a tree limb, attempting to adjust the angle and focus of an outdoor camera. Back at "HQ", Bryce leans forward in his comfy chair and squints at the picture..."Maybe a little to the left, Russell?"

And perhaps best of all, when Bryce decides to join the hunt himself, he does so by putting four cameras on his vehicle and driving up and down the road at night, hoping to see bigfoot cross the road. The kicker? He actually gets footage of something, probably some of the best bigfootage of the show.

It's Not About Bryce

Okay, so I have to admit, I knew nothing of Bryce Johnson before I saw this show, but apparently he was already a fairly accomplished actor and co-host of a really good supernatural podcast (The Bigfoot Collector's Club). I thought this was just some dude, and that kind of fueled my "Hey, I can do that" mentality. And while I may make light of his duties, he does them really well.

I like Bryce, really. He's funny on the podcast and on the Expedition Bigfoot show he has this almost childlike earnestness that shows through and makes him very likeable. When a witness tells him something, no matter how ridiculous, he makes you think he either believes it or wants desperately to believe it. Heck, in season two he moves the whole show from Kentucky to Washington state after a random guy flags him down in a gas station to tell him "Bigfoot is in Washington and the government knows about it." That's a leap of faith, there.

I mean, I have to hate him a little bit because he's young and good-looking and ultra-successful in the exact job that I want, but it's like 4% hate and 96% like. But somehow I think if by some miracle I took over Expedition Bigfoot or started some other bigfoot show that became his biggest competitor, number one it's not going to hurt his career one bit, and number two it's not going to bother him one bit. Dude is the definition of "Chill".

I'm Here For You

The bottom line here is that I'm here for you. If you're producing "Expedition Bigfoot" and Bryce is looking to move on, if you're producing another bigfoot show, heck if you're just thinking you might want to produce another bigfoot show, I'm the guy you need holding down Bigfoot HQ. I'm a good coordinator, can use radios, cell phones and computers, and I don't mind driving around with cameras on my car or sitting for long hours in luxury cabins. I'm also able to look very earnest while interviewing people, no matter how ridiculous their stories may be. There's like 10,000 streaming services out there--one of them has a spot for me, right?

Related Articles