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How to avoid the Jehovah's Witnesses on your doorstep.

I have no problem with people having a different religion to mine, after all, each to their own, and there are so many religions that are 'popular', each follower apparently believing their chosen religion, and only theirs, is the correct one, (everyone else must be wrong, mustn't they?). No, my problem is not specifically with the difference of opinion on religious choice, (after all, I converted from Church of England, following a Catholic School early education, to being a Pagan!). My problem mainly lies with my privacy being invaded at often very inconvenient times, and by people trying to tell me my choice is wrong, and then trying to force their own religion on to me instead. I suspect many of you know which religion I am talking about by now (the title of this hub was a bit of a give away), yes, I am referring to Jehovah's Witnesses.

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Now I don't know about you, but I have somehow been unlucky enough to have Jehovah's witnesses try to visit me on a number of awkward or annoying occasions. For example, when I have been enjoying a long soak in the bath, when I have been making love, when I have been cooking and when I am in the middle of watching a very enjoyable TV programme. I am so polite that I find it very difficult to say "buggar off, I'm busy", so I usually end up having a polite conversation with them on my doorstep, even if still clad only in my dressing gown or bathrobe!

The last significant experience I had was when I made the mistake of allowing a couple of nice young male 'Witnesses' into my home when I lived in England. I told them I was a Pagan, more specifically a 'Wiccan', thinking they might accept this and leave me alone in my beliefs. Not so, my sources that had previously told me Jehovah's Witnesses leave Pagans alone because it is the hardest religion to 'break', were apparently wrong. My statement just acted as a 'gauntlet thrown down', in other words, I became a challenge. When they eventually left I was given a heap of 'Watchtower Magazines', one of which included a large article on the evils of Pagansim and Wicca as a religion. After reading them through briefly out of morbid curiosity, I quickly dispatched these to the bin, which in my opinion was where these bigoted articles deserved to be.

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I have since read some interesting pieces of advice on how to avoid Jehovah Witnesses, and I decided to put these all in one place, hopefully with a humorous slant that will appeal to my readers, (although I somehow doubt I shall amuse the Jehovah Witnesses that read this). If it helps at all, one of my neighbours is a Jehovah Witness, but thankfully she is not one of the 'knocking on doors' variety, and does not force her religion down other people's throats. Additionally I have spoken to friends of mine who also know 'Witnesses' , and they have told me their Jehovah Witness friends are not of the questionable belief that blood transfusions should not be allowed, (even if their own child's life depends on it) and that they are not all inclined to force feed others their beliefs in a 'Pâté Foie Gras' style. This much is a relief, but it still leaves me wanting to maintain both my religious and personal privacy, and not be approached with a view to being 'saved' by any religious group.

So here goes with my advice on how to avoid the Jehovah's Witnesses on your doorstep.

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1) Hide.... honestly, this really works. My Husband did this only the other day. I heard the knock on the door, and called out to him to answer it. He rapidly appeared in the room I was in with vigorous 'shushing' motions, whispering that the Jehovah's Witnesses were outside and he had seen them working their way around our complex. Apparently they nearly missed our front door because it hasn't got a name above it, but one sharp eyed 'Witness' spotted it, and decided to 'give it a go', resulting in my Husband and I hiding in the upstairs bedroom for several minutes until the area was 'safe'. We later found out our neighbours had done exactly the same!!

2) My Mum's recommended method, quickly devised upon coming home to find my Stepfather had, in error, allowed two female Jehovah's Witnesses into their living room. She told them that we were all Catholics and both her daughters had received a Catholic education. This did the trick and they soon left, blissfully unaware that none of the family are actually Catholics.

3) A fellow hubber suggested this one ages ago. Answer the front door wearing a large flowing robe, and explain you can't speak to them right now as you are busy and need to go slaughter a goat for your altar. A lengthy knife in one hand, (with a bit of carefully applied ketchup), can add to the authenticity of your claim.

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4) A gamble, but I have known of people who have been brave enough to invite the Jehovah's Witnesses into their home, purely to debate the issue of their religion with them. In some cases I have heard of, (at least one a fellow hubber), they actually talked their visitors around, and the Witnesses left questioning their own beliefs and what they had been taught, largely because they were young themselves, and had never yet questioned what they had been told in any depth. As far as I know they never returned, so obviously they were the converts, and not the other way around!

5) An excellent one I found on the Internet was: "A friend claims that when Jehovah's Witlesses knock on her door, her first response is to ask for their address. When they ask why she wants to know, she says it is so she can visit them to push her beliefs. So far, none of them have given their address. It also marks the end of the interview".

6) Answer the door naked.... need I say more!


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7) Point out that according to their own beliefs only 144,000 of them are going to Heaven, so statistically the odds are against them being one of the lucky ones, leaving you as a 'new convert' with no hope.

8) Actually this one is not funny, but should be mentioned as it is quite shocking, "

There is an article on the official Jehovah's Witness website about child abuse. It states that if a Jehovah's witness child accuses another JW of abuse, the child must first try to reconcile the problem with that molester. If the abuser denies abuse then no further action will be taken as Jehovah will sort it!!!!!!!!!!!! No mention of the police or other authorities!

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9) Post a notice on your front door stating that you are off donating blood to the local blood bank (totally against their religion).

10) Advise them that your Horoscope said you should beware of visiting strangers with a message!! (Horoscopes a big no no to Jehovah's Witnesses). Actually, for a full, and quite shocking list of what Jehovah's Witnesses are apparently not allowed to do... go to this link and prepare to fall over backwards at the list you will be confronted by.

Comments

Cindy Lawson (author) from Guernsey (Channel Islands) on June 12, 2012:

Okay lupandiomo, I understand that you are not yet ready to discover Paganism, and that is fine (not my job to convert anyone to Paganism, it has to be discovered). Maybe in another lifetime you too will reach this level of spiritual advancement and find it for yourself).

Naturally I know this isn't 'the only life there is', and I do believe there is something after. I am somewhat surprised though that anyone still believes in the 'Garden of Eden' story when it is obviously genetically impossible for this to be accurate.

Honestly I have no need to read JW magazines as I am already on what I feel is the absolute correct path, and I have no desire to go backwards. Each to their own, but I strongly suggest you stick to what feels right to you, but don't expect everyone else to find it right for them, or assume you are right (or want what you feel is right rammed down their throats on their own doorsteps during their own private time).

No need really to scream my name in capital letters in your final comment, (honestly, is this what desperation to get people to convert to your point of view as JW's does to a person!!). As for dismissing the link I posted, well, you might not believe what is in it, but it has been compiled by many people including former JW's, so I guess burying your head in the sand would be the easier option.

Finally I don't need to, (or desire) any 'hold on you', why would I? You keep coming to this hub, I don't follow you to yours! Get over yourself, you may feel 'free' right now, but hey, let's see what happens when we die and then we will all know the real truth. Meanwhile I am accepting and offering blood transfusions where needed, and will happily accept an organ transplant if I ever need one, and will donate my organs to anyone who needs them after I die. God would not have made this possible if he did not intend us to use this to our advantage and to save lives. Even Jesus performed miracles to save lives!!!

This is my last post debating this pointless issue. I wish you well in your life and hope you find what you seek one way or the other.

lupandiomo from nairobi,kenya. on June 12, 2012:

I visited that link you suggested just to show that nothing will change my beliefs but like i knew in advance, couldn't find anything plausible, just half truths,hypocrisy,envy, even desperation to twist the truth.I tell you what,MISTYHORIZON2003,iam firmly in tact and neither you nor any pretender to the throne can convince me.You have no hold on me!the truth has set me freeeeeeeee!!!!

lupandiomo from nairobi,kenya. on June 12, 2012:

"all those who try to save their lives will lose it and those who lose their lives for my sake(including not breaking God's law regarding the sanctity of blood-God's commandments never change-they remain forever.It's important to remember that Jehovah gave the express commandment to the children of Israel to bleed the animal after killing it,doing this showed their respect for blood as the source of life from God.The same commandment was repeated in the 1st century C, mind you ,thousands of years later after it was first made) will gain it",said Jesus.Therefore, even if i should have to lose my life for remaining obedient to God,I know that he will resurrect me in paradise on earth.Yes,mistyhorizo2003,this ain't the only life there is, real life as God originally planned in the garden of Eden is close at hand!And the evidence of all this is allover the place including widespread indifference to the truth which prophecy you are helping to fulfill right now.i would like to say that my family are those that worship the lord.I try to extend an olive branch to my immediate family but if they remain indifferent to the teaching,its their choice and besides there are methods of treatment that entirely depend on the individual and not the organization.You simply are out of touch with JW's doctrines.Please read their magazines,the latest ones, if only to have an idea of what they really stand for.Stop relying on hearsay.

lupandiomo from nairobi,kenya. on June 12, 2012:

"all those who try to save their lives will lose it and those who lose their lives for my sake(including not breaking God's law regarding the sanctity of blood-God's commandments never change-they remain forever.It's important to remember that Jehovah gave the express commandment to the children of Israel to bleed the animal after killing it,doing this showed their respect for blood as the source of life from God.The same commandment was repeated in the 1st century CE mind you ,thousands of years later after it was first made) will gain it"said Jesus.Therefore, even if i should have to lose my life for remaining obedient to God,I know that he will resurrect me in paradise on earth.Yes,mistyhorizo2003,this ain't the only life there is, real life as God originally planned in the garden of Eden is close at hand!And the evidence of all this is allover the place including widespread indifference to the truth which prophecy you are helping to fulfill right now.i would like to say that my family are those that worship the lord.I try to extend an olive branch to my immediate family but if they remain indifferent to the teaching,its their choice and besides there are methods of treatment that entirely depend on the individual and not the organization.You simply are out of touch with JW's doctrines.Please read their magazines, latest ones if only to have idea what they really stand for.Stop relying on hearsay.

! on June 09, 2012:

lupandiomo we dont say god bless you because it isn't our place to say who he blesses .... Also, referring to the hub; they shouldn't be a change in transfusion or "door knockers." They should all preach and all refuse blood transfusions. If you are truly troubled or interested in why this is the case, dont hesitate to ask a JW why and they will explain it from the scriptures, and not unjustified direction from some earthly man.

! on June 09, 2012:

The best way if you truly arent interested is just to say "sorry, i have my own beliefs and I'm quite content with them thank you" smile and shut the door. We (being one myself) go around because we are obliged to as we have found the bible to say. (we take the unaltered bible and dont have to change what we believe to suit people as some do, because its not our place to say what the bible is saying as i feel some christian domination's have forgotten.)You can just say that you no longer want to be contacted, this will then follow on and once a year someone will come to the door asking if you have changed your mind, if not they will walk away. (this annual visit is also to check for a change in ownership of the house, not to be annoying). I will just say finally that we dont want to annoy anyone :/ we do it out of duty and because we feel what we have found will benefit others. Some do respond and have had enriched lives because of it. Obviously it isn't for everyone and we respect that. (PS. some can be quite forceful and i apologise but dont be afraid to be firm in saying no if you are getting offended or annoyed) THANKS

Cindy Lawson (author) from Guernsey (Channel Islands) on June 04, 2012:

So you would be happy to let a loved one die, or yourself, rather than have a blood transfusion or an organ transplant lupandiomo? Can you confirm this?

Regarding the observation you made: "If this were not God's work,it might as well have dissipated away by now altogether.", I would happily say that on that basis Paganism (which has been around far longer) is still incredibly popular today and is actually rapidly growing in popularity, which seems to indicate the this too must be 'Gods work' or it would have dissipated altogether!

I don't have any reason to feel that I need to 'learn the truth about exactly what JWs stand for', mainly because I am comfortable with my chosen religion (maybe you too will discover it one day and realise why it feels so 'right'). I for one find it patronising, condescending and rude to be accosted on my own doorstep by uninvited people who treat me as if my choice is wrong because theirs is apparently right, (even when any rational individual would allow medical science to save a dying relative rather than watch them die needlessly). Escaping any form of religious brainwashing is vital, and this is why I am content with my choice, it makes sense, it respects the planet and the environment, it believes in a greater power (God) and it does not condone forcing others to follow it, it is left to the 'ready' individual to seek it out and find it for themselves.

Good Luck with your choice, I just hope your family members never need blood or organs, and that if they do, you will be content allowing them to go without!

You too might also benefit from reading the following link, as you may change your mind about your choices once you do,

http://thejehovahswitnesses.org/things-jehovahs-wi...

lupandiomo from nairobi,kenya. on June 04, 2012:

yeah,that makes for a great humor and fun and jokes.Just remember the concept of relativity(relativism) has got no place in religion at least not in real and true Christianity.Please humble yourself and kindly take note of the ever increasing gathering of the great crowd all year round( you can read from many of their publications or even secular works that are objective).If this were not God's work,it might as well have dissipated away by now altogether. Please read thoroughly on Jw's Life experiences during both world wars and beyond and try to relate that with what Jesus predicted would mark his true followers.I too used to be rude to them until I saw the truth.All this time Jehovah's long suffering was shown me.If you are sincere enough I believe you will have the patience to learn the truth about exactly what JWs stand for and not mock a very very serious job commissioned by Jesus to his followers to do. As for me, I won't look back because I know I have found the truth and i am moving toward dedicating myself to Jehovah through baptism in the next couple days.God Bless you.

Cindy Lawson (author) from Guernsey (Channel Islands) on May 28, 2012:

I agree there probably is a God if that helps, and there is something after this life. I am a Pagan by religion and that is something I am 100% comfortable with. Unlike many other religions we work on the principle the Paganism is a path you find on your own, and it is not our job to convert people to the religion. Like most I discovered Paganism after years of being 'fed' the Bible and Christianity at school. Much of what the Bible said did not sit right with me and still doesn't. I struggled with people saying animals didn't have souls for instance. Eventually I came across Paganism and all its love of nature and the environment, and it was like coming home.

I believe that you believe what JW's do is the same as warning someone of a disaster like a hurricane, I also believe that you believe there is some great new system coming to mankind. The problem is other people already have religions (if they are religious) or none if they are atheist. They too believe strongly in what they have chosen as a path, and for that reason it is better to let people discover on their own what sits right with them, and not invade their privacy to force your beliefs upon them. As per my earlier suggestion, do it in the high street if necessary, at least people are able to walk past and are not obliged to stop what they are doing in order to answer a door and then politely try and 'get rid' of the unwanted visitors. It is very disrespectful of other's beliefs to basically take the attitude 'you are wrong, I am right, so I have to tell you about the right things to believe and I don't care if you hate me turning up on your doorstep to do so'. They no doubt feel equally sure you are wrong and they are right, and the bottom line is that we will only find out for sure once we die, the rest is just beliefs based on what each person has been taught or felt comfortable with.

popo walker on May 28, 2012:

Let's at least agree everyone has to believe in something , God , no God I don't know, Budda. OUR GOVERNMENT!!. We just look at it as if a hurricane or some other disaster were coming we would expect the weater station or some gov. agency to warn us if they new ahead of time. hOW ABOUT THE MILLIONAIR WOULD YOU HATE HIM TO KNOCK ON YOUR DOOR We are telling you about a wonderful new system of things that is coming the mankind and just wanting you to be able to share is this NEW life the Bible speaks about. It says it will last for a thousand years with no satanic influence , no war , no hate, no siclness . We don't need to convince you we just need to tell you and let you make up your own mind,

Cindy Lawson (author) from Guernsey (Channel Islands) on May 27, 2012:

Thank you for the added information Popo Walker, but does anyone know who actually wrote the Dead Sea Scrolls and how accurate they were? I still find it very hard to believe that the Scrolls or God said no to blood transfusions and organ transplants as they didn't exist then! I also find it very odd that so many other deities shared the same life experiences as Jesus apparently did, born of virgin mothers, dying and rising from the dead etc etc, yet frequently these deities pre-date the era when Christ was supposed to have been around.

I actually don't want to turn this hub into a forum thread debating who is right and who is wrong (there is enough of that going on the HP Religious forums as it is, and this is why I avoid them because they have become sickening places to be). The sole purpose of this Hub was to be mildly amusing, and to illustrate how frustrating it is to be bothered by people on your own doorstep who believe you need to hear their message because they know better than you do who, and how, you should worshipping.

Popo Walker on May 27, 2012:

That's exacley why Jw's went back to the orginal manuscripts and dead sea scrolls and now a modern day translation for our bible. Words over time change in meaning like "Gay" used to mean happy and we don't say Thee,and Thou anymore. The King James Version has been Revised (not Re-translated)Many Many times. So any errors in interpretation were just passed on. By the way the King James Ver was not the first Bible there were several before it. Paul said that in his time men saw like thru a glass darkly near the end of time we would see clearley. Much has been revieled thru God's spirit in recent years and all is verified in the scriptures. We just didn't always understand or weren't able to see.

Cindy Lawson (author) from Guernsey (Channel Islands) on May 25, 2012:

Thanks for your thoughts lupandiomo, sadly this does not excuse the invasion of privacy covered in this article even if they are correct in their beliefs and interpretations of the Bible (assuming even that was written down accurately after all the versions, translations etc)..

lupandiomo from nairobi,kenya. on May 25, 2012:

i believe and have come to believe that these pple represent true believers of the Bible's teachings.Period.

popo walker on May 23, 2012:

Thnaks for the commit. We all are not perfect but as christians that do believe the Bible we need to follow Christ's example and the scriptures that say we must go door to door. This is not simple for us either. Our gas our time our preporation . All you need to do is say not interested and we are SUPPOSED to say thankyou and leave.

Cindy Lawson (author) from Guernsey (Channel Islands) on May 20, 2012:

I am sorry Popo walker, but it is evident that people have commented here saying say asked to be removed from the list of homes to visit, and it didn't work. I am not saying this will happen every time, but to be honest we shouldn't have to find ways to remove the problem, as it shouldn't have happened in the first place. If JW's want to stand in a public place and invite people to talk to them there, that might be more acceptable as people have a choice to stop, or to walk past. At home they don't always know who is at the door before they answer it, they could be asleep, watching a film, cooking dinner, in the bath etc, in which case it is very annoying to be dragged away in order to have someone else's beliefs forced on them. Apart from anything else it is an invasion of privacy, and an arrogant assumption that the JW's have that they know better than everyone else. As far as I am concerned (and I am sure most will agree with me here), JW's are in no way responsible for our spirituality, we are responsible for our own and don't need to be treated like school children who need educating.

Personally I could never condone or consider a religion that would allow their own family member to die rather than let them have a blood transfusion or an organ transplant. I can't believe any loving God would condone this either.

Sorry, I am sure you are a lovely person who believes what he has been taught is the right way to go, but you have to accept that this is an opinion, and based on an interpretation of a very old and dusty book. The world is full of religions, each of which believe theirs is the right one. Well not everyone can be right, and we are each free to make our own choice without it being thrust upon us!

popo walker on May 20, 2012:

I am one of Jehovah's Witnesses and have been for some 50 years. It is very sad to see some of the terrible comments on here - all of which are simply not true. Do you think it is easy to go from door to door and encountering what we know are people like what I see on here? The reason we do this is because it is what Christ Jesus did and all the apostles did and what Jesus commanded Christians to do until the time of end comes. Matthew 24:14 - "This gospel of the the Kingdome will be preached throughout the entire earth until the End comes." We know you are hiding in your house, we know you are not answering your door, but that's OK - we are there only to give you a chance to hear the message of God's Kingdom under Christ Jesus' rulership in the Heavens. All the things you do to avoid us means you have taken your stand already, and that's OK too. If you really don't want us to come to your door anymore, just tell us to mark it on our territories and your house will be skipped. That means you have made your choice, taken your stand, and that makes you 100% responsible for your actions and relieves us of any responsibility for your spirituality.

Cindy Lawson (author) from Guernsey (Channel Islands) on May 18, 2012:

Cheers AEther, I am a Pagan too, so I guess we think alike. Reading some of the comments here it seems that not all 'Witnesses' are open to being turned away without returning. Perhaps more drastic measures are sometimes necessary! lol

AEther on May 18, 2012:

LOL that was a great article. I'm tempted to try some of them. Although, my husband always seems to get them to leave us alone by saying "I'm sorry, we have different beliefs in this household. Thank you, take care." They usually never return. He is an atheist and I am pagan.

Cindy Lawson (author) from Guernsey (Channel Islands) on April 27, 2012:

Thanks for your great comment lambservant. Good points all round :)

Lori Colbo from United States on April 26, 2012:

Hilarious. My favorites in order: the robe, knife and goat; the blood bank sign, and asking for their address. The child abuse thing is horrendous. What could they be thinking telling a sexually victimized child to go the the criminal that violated them and try to reconcile. They are asking the child victim to make nice and be friends with a sexual predator. They are not the true Jehovah's witnesses. If they can't correctly identify a pedophile, if they can't correctly chose the right response to such a situation, then what makes them think they know enough about Jehovah to be his witness?

Cindy Lawson (author) from Guernsey (Channel Islands) on April 22, 2012:

Thanks Burn, a great and in depth response to this article. I would love to respond in depth, but my Mum has to go into hospital tomorrow and I need to get an early night so I am able to visit her etc. I would hope to God that if she needed a blood transfusion I would never be in the 'JW' camp which says this is wrong.

Burn on April 22, 2012:

JW or 7 Day. It is all the same manure pile to me. I have yet to try opening the door and "not see them or hear them" and then mutter "darn kids" while the JW's are standing right there. and close the door normally.

In the beginning...I listened and without knowing anything about their beliefs, asked some "POINTED" question that the sheep could not answer. The lead guy said we will come back again with an answer.

In other words these 2 did not have a clue between them (it made no difference to me whether they could quote Page 1395, verse 224 section 45 as they do or the 7's do as being a bit to "show off" - I do not even know Page 1,verse 1,section 1...and do not plan to learn it either.

On reading the beginning of this blog I "did not know for example that according the J.W.'s- they are not dead but unconscious. Talk about giving me ammo.

Unconscious people - so they are burying them alive "or what"?

Cause buddy, I have been unconscious - for 2 weeks. While unconscious the body does not rot.

I am going to bet their "dead ones" do. Flesh stinks as it rots. Explain the unconscious state they are in.

If no one gets to partake in the wine and bread ritual at their one ceremony(cheapskates) then why rub it under the noses of the others? The first 144,000 have already come and gone so is that not just flagrant and cockiness to do that?

The masses follow the "elders" - everyone gets to be an elder(as we all age at the same rate).

If the so called "elder" is younger than you, he is a youngster.

They self elect themselves, or proclaim themselves to be chosen to lead. That means they are the first to jump into the fire. That is what leading is all about.

Have you ever corralled actual sheep? Say to a shearing barn..

If the leader hits the wire fence before it finds the gate - the rest of the flock will do the same thing

"Dumb and dumber". I do not see any pride in calling myself part of a flock.

Cows are smarter. Goats too.

This business about refusal of blood transfusions.(all the emphasis has been placed on the children)What about the elders? They drive cars. Accidents happen. Would they take blood if it meant saving "their life"? Darn right they would just because "God said so" to them.

A total contradiction to the rules.

The rules some ancients made up. Ancient who? Out of Europe who.

Really, and they bother those that live in houses but will not do so in "walled Adult communities"

They do not challenge themselves at all. They hand out booklets, yet they cannot read the sign on the door "no solicitation of any kind"