The phone rings, you pick it up and say hello. The caller id informed you who it is, but you always say hello nonetheless, out of habit. The first question is "What are you doing?" As always, you answer, "Oh...Nothing" Come on, that's lame! You've got to be doing something, right?
The fact is, you may not be doing too much at the moment, but saying "I'm just clipping my toe nails" or, "I'm setting the clock on my microwave" just isn't going to cut it. I've come up with a few better ideas. Let's get creative, the next time you pick up the phone, you will certainly not be doing nothing. Try these.
At the gym - You are actually on your couch, but hey it's not much of a stretch, you are watching sports. Whoever is calling will be really impressed considering it's 9pm on a Saturday night. Such dedication.
Working on your novel - Or a scathing 200 word letter to the editor, but still you're writing something, and that's not nothing.
On a food drive - The caller may think you are helping the homeless, or donating your time to a worthy cause. So what if you're just at the grocery store picking up coffee creamer?
At a protest - Standing up for the little guy. You're always looking for ways to be involved. Okay, you saw them on the news, but you can protest in your own way. You left those witty comments on that website!
Entertaining guests - Let's see, there's you, the cat, and......the Fed Ex guy stopped by right?
At a foreign film festival- Sounds intriguing. A Netflix night is always fun.
Hiking- From the final parking spot in the Walmart parking lot. How many people can they fit in this place?
Fighting crime - You are part of the neighborhood watch team. Is it a team? Team sounds important so let's stick with that one. Anyway, as part of the team you prevent crime on your street daily, watch out punks.
Doing research - Should you start Drew Brees or Tom Brady this week? Setting your fantasy football lineup, you have to do your homework. This is serious, bragging rights are at stake.
At a fund raiser - Sounds better than working.
Cooking - It may only be microwave popcorn, but who's to say it's not a 5 course meal?
Stilll need ideas?
Visit www.fatherknowslittle where I try to figure out this whole parenting thing.
So Much To Do...
- Building a robot
- Delivering bear cubs
- Playing Tic Tac Toe
- Sky Diving - and answering the phone!
- Curing Cancer
- At the game, race, match, bout, duel
- Stuck in an elevator
- Learning a foreign language
- Walking a tightrope
- Chewing gum
- Swimming the English Channel
- Building a Habitat For Humanity house
- Performing an archaeological dig
- Fighting a forest fire
- At a Civil War reenactment
- Untangling your Christmas lights
- At a seminar
- Birdwatching (quiet please!)
- Deep sea fishing
- At Space camp
- Collecting stamps
- At the library (Shhh!)
- On a Safari
- Playing guitar
- Taking the Wonderlic Exam
- Organizing your itunes playlists
- Painting a self-portrait
- Writing a hub
So the next time your phone rings you will be prepared. You are doing things and going places. Your friends and family will get off the phone with you and wonder why they aren't grabbing life by the horns the way you are. You on the other hand, will get off the phone feeling charged and energized...and get right back to doing nothing.
Baharealizim on May 23, 2020:
Sevdim harika ya
Jim Henderson from Hattiesburg, Mississippi on May 07, 2020:
Loved it! I'm usually trying to suppress my inner juvenile when asked this.
Delightfully 'snarky' ideas. I may have to print this out for use. So when are you coming out with the sequel?
Trooly on February 10, 2020:
Haha, nice one. Didn't see that coming.
Deborah Minter from U.S, California on April 14, 2018:
Funny Article!... And great ideas.
John Hansen from Queensland Australia on February 11, 2015:
Love these suggestions Westbrook, I'm certainly going to use at least half of them. Voted up.
Daisy Mariposa from Orange County (Southern California) on February 10, 2015:
I was looking for some laughs, and I knew I would find them in your Hubs. Great job!
Pete Fanning (author) from Virginia on April 27, 2012:
Thanks Deborah and Brian, I appreciate it!
Brian Burton on November 14, 2011:
My favorite "At a protest - Standing up for the little guy..."
Awesome hub :)
Deborah Neyens from Iowa on November 09, 2011:
Your hubs always make me smile, weestro.
Pete Fanning (author) from Virginia on November 07, 2011:
No easy task Gerg! Thanks for reading and commenting!
Gregory S Williams from California on November 06, 2011:
Love it! "Delivering bear cubs" = my favorite...
Ania L from United Kingdom on November 04, 2011:
Excellent ideas, although I took different approach - I don't answer the phone atr all - email or a text message is so much better as it's not invasive :) Great hub!
Pete Fanning (author) from Virginia on November 01, 2011:
Ah yes Alecia, tried and true!
Alecia Murphy from Wilmington, North Carolina on October 31, 2011:
Great Hub! I have one to add: I'm on vacation when you really just called in sick.
Pete Fanning (author) from Virginia on October 31, 2011:
Funny Spiderbytes! Phoebe, I wasn't really going for getting off the phone, just joking about sounding more interesting. Thanks for reading guys!
Phoebe Pike on October 31, 2011:
Wow. I have to say fibbing, even to get off the phone faster is a bit much. You could just as easily try brutal honesty or if you want to be alone and left alone you could say you are practicing solitaty awareness... which is not a lie and normally gets people to leave you alone so you can get back to it. But still, a cute and funny hub.
SpiderBytes from Wild Wild West on October 31, 2011:
"Learning a foreign language" - There must be a Taco Bell commercial on TV! LOL! Great hub!
Pete Fanning (author) from Virginia on October 31, 2011:
Good one raburke! poopy diaper should get the job done as that's always exciting I'm sure Jenu!
jenubouka on October 31, 2011:
When you want to end the conversation abruptly, just mention you are changing a poopy diaper, this will ensure not even call me back!
raburcke from Fuengirola, Málaga, Spain on October 31, 2011:
And another one: "Let me just check my diary, if I can fit you in right now!" When in actuality you are watching the first episode of Neighbours or Dallas(in Spanish!)for the quadruzillionth time!