Skip to main content

Disaster Porn Saturday Night Movie of the Week: Asteroid

Wilson (Richard Waddingham-L) Spencer (Cuyle Carvin) and Kenny (LeJon Woods-R)must make a life changing decision

Wilson (Richard Waddingham-L) Spencer (Cuyle Carvin) and Kenny (LeJon Woods-R)must make a life changing decision

What would you do if you moved your family from the city to the woods and then found out that an asteroid was heading toward earth? The good news would be that you’re living in the woods, the bad news it’s going to hit your house.

And insurance isn’t going to cover it.

Fed up with the rat race, Spencer Coleman (Cuyle Carvin) buys a house in Oneonta, New York and his family is seeing it for the first time.

His optimistic wife Lynn (Mattie Jo Cowset) loves it, while daughter Zoe (Miley Rose) tells him it needs a new roof. Naturally, Zoe needs to get back to her phone but there’s no service.

Well, there is service and she has to hang out the bathroom window and after Spencer goes into town to The Internet Store, employee Milton (Maxwell Lehman) tells him it’s going to be $33,012 for the line.

With Lynn and Zoe unpacking, Spencer is at the hardware store owned by his school acquaintance Kenny (LeJon Woods) when NASA breaks in with news of the asteroid that they just discovered and its going to hit somewhere on the planet.

The countdown to destruction begins as the radio announcer (I swear it’s Kate McKinnon) gives updates and opinions on the asteroid and news reports go twenty four hours.

Zoe is the only one panicked by the asteroid since it will upset the chain supply and climate, as Lynn continues to organize the house.

Spencer meets neighbor Wilson (Richard Waddingham) who tells him that the asteroid is going to hit his house and points out “the spooks” on the road, or better known as Agents Thomson and Thompson (Angela Relucio and Bristol Pomeroy). The only way to tell them apart is by the spelling of their name.

After an outing for breakfast the next day, Zoe and Lynn go to The Phone Store where Chad (Spencer Sherry) that a new line will be $500 a month and each additional line is $4.99. He also likes Zoe.

Scroll to Continue

Since he’s out of primer, Spencer reluctantly calls Kenny and he brings a couple of gallons to him and then go for a drink where they run into Wilson.

NASA breaks in again and it’s now known that the asteroid is going to hit Oneonta and the residents run amuck in the streets.

Spencer says that he’s not leaving and he and the girls head to Kenny’s store for supplies. He nearly runs over the mayor (Elise Rovinsky) and she has him tell Kenny that there’s going to be a meeting later that night.

Kenny is thrilled with his Apocalypse Sale and the town isn’t thrilled when the president declares that Oneonta is no longer a part of the United States.

Mayor Mueller tells the remaining residents that they can store their personal belongings at the Secret Caverns if they want to.

Once again NASA breaks in with the coordinates and since asteroid is going to hit the Coleman house, Zoe and Lynn leave after Spencer has plastisized the windows with duct tape.

Tom Simmons from News One comes to the house to interview Spencer and get first hand coverage for when the space rock hits. The station paid the installation fee and now that Spencer has service, he gets a month free.

As the residents seek refuge at the caverns, they’re treated to a tour of it as Wilson, Spencer and Kenny figure out how to stop the asteroid and plan for their future.

By far, this is one of the best parodies of disaster movies that I’ve ever seen.

The dialogue is all over the place as are the actors and they have so much fun with mocking the genre. And of course the entire storyline is over the top.

There are so many little things about this movie that make it a little gem of a comedy. I’m not sure if it also parodies Don’t Look Up since I haven’t seen it, but I’m pretty sure that you’ll want to add this to your disastrous collection.

Related Articles