Grace knows birth order dynamics. Children are treated differently based upon their respective birth orders.
Our Little Precious Jewel, Ahhhhh, LOOK Everyone
Of all birth orders, youngest children seem to have it totally made. They are the last child in the family. They were never be dethroned like oldest and middle children are. They are self-assured that they are the center of their parents' universe. Yes, youngest children are privileged in ways that oldest and middle children are definitely not.
Youngest children are often loved the most in their families. Oh, no many parents jest. They loudly proclaim that they love ALL their children equally and that no one child is better than another in their sight. Is that really true? Studies show that the majority of parents do favor one child over other children in the family. Children also KNOW that some siblings are allowed carte blanche while others must walk the straight and narrow path. They notice how one child is forced to be the responsible one while another is free as a bird. Children ARE NOT fooled and can see through their parents'syllogisms that "all children are treated fairly." Oh, come now.
Youngest children are indeed one of the luckiest of birth orders. They are confident in the fact that they are IT, there will be NO more children after them. As last children, they are adored by parents and/or siblings alike. They are viewed as the precious little jewel of the family which nothing is denied. They are oftentimes loved more as they are seen as so cuddly and adorable by parents. They are seen as more vulnerable because of their birth order status, thus needing all the love and protection possible.
Youngest children by virtue of their ordinal birth order are also perceived by their parents as needing more taking care of. Well, they are the familial babies and as we all know, all babies need the utmost care, love, and protection. There is something about youngest children that makes parents want to completely envelop them. Youngest children are furthermore seen as utterly defenseless, making parents want to protect, nurture them, and come to their aid.
Parents love youngest children more because in their eyes, the latter needs their love. Youngest children are often hugged and given more attention than either the oldest and/or middle children in the family. Parents consider oldest children to be protoadults, not needing them as much. After all, the parents opine oldest children should be mature and/or adult enough to stand on their own, adding that they are at the age where they had better start being independent. Parents also consider middle children as no longing needing them as they did when younger.
To parents, oldest and middle children are seen as protoadults while youngest children are seen as more worthy of individualized and intense parental attention and love. Many parents see their youngest children as needing them the most. In many families, it is not unusual for parents to treat the youngest child the most preferentially. Yes, they often are treated better than either oldest and/or middle children in the family. After, they are the precious ones in the family and nothing at all is too good for them and any sacrifice made is worth it as long as the baby is happy.
According to a report in THE TELEGRAPH, parents in multichild families oftentimes give preferential treatment to youngest children. The report further elucidated that over 50% of parents stated to loving their youngest children more than their older children. Studies confirmed that youngest children receive the best of parental resources whether financially, emotionally, and/or psychologically. Parents tend to give their youngest children more treats and/or other forms of attention than they do their older children. Studies further substantiated that oldest children are often cast aside and/or otherwise diminished in favor of youngest children in the family.
Parents tend to favor their youngest children the most. They view youngest children as more lovable and less difficult than they do their older children. They also perceive their youngest children to be more malleable to parental wants and expectations. They further contend that youngest children are innocent which makes them want to do their best to protect and/or shield them from any form of negativity and/or hardship. Ultimately, they believe that the youngest child is THEIR ONE AND ONLY BABY who can do absolutely no wrong in their eyes.
Parents are more relaxed regarding their youngest children. They are not as harsh towards their youngest children as they were their oldest and/or middle child. Oldest and/or middle children were seen as parental testing and experimental grounds for implementation and establishment of certain childrearing parameters and paradigms. By the time youngest children arrive, parents are more self-assured and self-confident as to what is workable as far as parenting paradigms go. This translates into youngest children receive the full benefits of parental knowledge and expertise. Furthermore, as a result of more parental experience, parents of youngest children tend to be more tolerant of their foibles than they were of their older children.
Another by-product of more parental experience is that youngest children are permitted more leeways and/or avenues regarding behaviors that was not tolerated for the oldest and/or middle children of the family. With each succedent child in the family, parents tend to become more accepting of the varieties of child behavior. Youngest children are seldom, if ever, chastised when they do something wrong. Many parents relay that they are only babies and/or so young, hinting by virtue of their respective birth order, "they really don't know any better." This means that youngest children often get away with murder as far as their actions go.
Youngest children in many families are not held accountable and/or responsible for their actions because they are "the babies" of their famillies therefore they are guiltless and/or blameless. There are some parents who hold older siblings, particularly the oldest, quite culpable for their youngest siblings' actions and/or behaviors. Many an older and/or oldest sibling were often punished for what the youngest child does, figuring the oldest child ought to control the actions of his/her youngest sibling. As a result of not being held accountable by their parents, many youngest children believe that they can do anything they want as nothing will be said to them anyway.
In many families, youngest children tend to receive the best of things, sometimes at the expense of older siblings in the family. There are parents who figure that it is okay for older siblings to do without. After all, their older siblings can endure the circumstances as they are no longer babies. However, the youngest, without fail and/or exception, is to have everything or almost everything possible. In some families, youngest children are shielded from things that their older siblings were forced to face and endure.
Youngest children are oftentimes free of responsibilities as everything is done for them by either their parents and/or older siblings. All of the birth orders, youngest children have the most prolonged and freest of childhoods and adolescence. They do not have caretaking responsibilities as oldest and some middle children do. They are often infantilized by parents beyond the age when it is no longer appropriate. It is not unusual for many youngest children as adults to be unfamiliar with rudimentary life skills such as cooking, cleaning, and/or other related responsibilities. How they be familiar with such things when their parents and/or siblings constantly waited on them,catering to their every wish.
Many youngest children as adults have a sense of entitlement as a result of being infantlized and having everything done for them. They act as if everything and/or everyone should revolve around them. They have no sense of teamwork and sharing. They have a "me" attitude, thinking only of themselves and not of others. They tend not to be not self-starters, always wanting to be rescued and avoiding any type of responsibility and/or accountability. They also feel that they should not have to sacrifice or work for what they want, it should be GIVEN to them.
Many youngest children are resented, even hated by their older siblings as a result of the more favorable treatment received from their parents. Many older siblings were treated more differentially albeit more harshly than their youngest counterparts. Some had to forego and sacrifice their own needs and/or desires to benefit the youngest children in the family. Many older sibling relay why they did not have the same privileges and/or rights that their youngest siblings have. They felt as if they were secondhand citizens while the youngest siblings were considered royalty or as the elect. Oftentimes, such preferential treatment on the part of parents causes lasting wounds, animosities, and/or rifts that last a lifetime.
In conclusion, parents oftentimes treat youngest children more favorably in terms of love and attention in order to other physical and financial rewards. Many parents see youngest children as more vulnerable and defenseless thus they devote the most time and care to the latter. Parents are also more lenient towards youngest children as they have gain valuable parenting experience in raising their older siblings.
Many youngest children are shielded from the harsher and more negative aspects of life by their parents. Compared to their older siblings, youngest children have little or no responsibilities. They also have the opportunity to be children and adolescence longer. However, parental favoritism and preferential treatment of youngest children can result in their becoming entitled and irresponsible as adults. It can also cause a rift between them and their older siblings that can last a lifetime. Smart parents realize that all their children, regardless of birth order, need equal treatment in terms of love, attention, and delegating responsibilities. No one child should ever receive dissimilar treatment and have different expectations of him/her based upon birth order.
© 2013 Grace Marguerite Williams
Grace Marguerite Williams (author) from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York on July 16, 2015:
In multichild families, there is a higher incident of favoritism. THERE is going to be ONE CHILD who is going to be treated BETTER while OTHER CHILDREN are either discarded or ignored or otherwise treated unfavorably.
Jayden on July 16, 2015:
Hi! I am a youth at the age of 13. My family has a lot of problems. My elder brother is a prefect and my parents have him everything he wants. I am the second and if I want to hang out with my friends like go to the playground and play badminton, they don't allow. My younger brother is the loved one. Whenevwr he is at fault, my mother stands up for him. I am the only one not loved.
Grace Marguerite Williams (author) from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York on February 25, 2015:
You are so correct in your premise. In multichild families, it is THE OLDEST child who suffers while THE YOUNGEST gets all the accolades. Think I will write a hub about this soon. Thank you for stopping by and responding!
noo on February 25, 2015:
Im a kid and when your mom starts paying attention to your little sister more or brother it hurts and it makes you feel sad it isn't a good feeling and most of theese comments are from parents who don't know what they are talking about i get sad when my mom pays more attention to my little sister than me because i love my mom and most older kids absouloutly love their paremts and to get thrown to the side just because of some kid after all theese years its the worst feeling in the world if you have an older kid please pay attention to them too because i feel lonely
Grace Marguerite Williams (author) from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York on January 30, 2014:
Yes, mature and enlightened parents love their children the same. However, such parents are in the minority. Parents are supposed to love their children the same. Sadly, the overwhelming majority of parents practice favoritism whether they wish to admit it or not. In many families, oldest children are oftentimes discarded and cast aside in favor of the youngest child. The youngest child in many families are granted quarter in ways that oldest children aren't. Youngest children have the longest and freest childhoods while oldest children have to assume responsibilities at early stages. However, in small families of 2 children, oldest children and youngest children are on equal par with each other as you have aptly illustrated in your comment. Youngest children in small families are given the same responsibilities and are more or less treated equally. In large families of 6-more children, oldest children catch hell while youngest children are the jewels who can get away with murder and are more likely to be favored. Usually the larger the family, the more likely the youngest child is favored over the oldest child. Sam, please check out my articles on birth order, small and large families. Thank you for stopping by and commenting.
Sam Hamton on January 30, 2014:
I'm am not a parent, but I know that each parent should love each child the same. I'm only 20 years old , not to long ago I was a teenager I had a little sister 5 years old . We were both loved the same ,and our parents showed it. There a few things that were because I am older than her. If your children don't listen it is because you've done something. Like not give them many rules. Or you gave them to much freedom. Freedom that's something every parent should watch out for. You give your children to much freedom they will go overboard, and that's when the problem start. You give children little freedom they will want more then they will start to take the freedom they want. So you have got to known your children. There are also many other ways that you the parent has things wrong. Don't get me wrong children do things wrong, but you have to understand one of the reasons way.
Grace Marguerite Williams (author) from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York on July 18, 2013:
Sadly, they do not. As I have said repeatedly, oldest children are the discardable and disposable ones. The larger the family, the more unequal familial treatment in terms of the oldest and youngest child. Of all birth orders, oldest children are treated the WORST while the youngest child is treated the BEST. The preferential treatment of youngest children is why many oldest children resent them. This preferential treatment of youngest children creates a chasm which often last a lifetime.
Devika Primić from Dubrovnik, Croatia on July 18, 2013:
The younger child does get the most attention and off-course tend to lack the care of the older ones, most parents don't realize the older children still need them
Zubair Ahmed on July 02, 2013:
Nice hub thank you for sharing. I don't think that is the case that the youngest is favored by parents. I think it is mainly down to parents feeling that the older kids can look after themselves whereas the youngest is still growing up and learning the ropes, hence needs that little bit more attention. I feel parents love all their kids equally.