The author is an enthusiastic researcher. She is studying psychology as an optional subject for the civil service exam.
Understanding Your Child's Behavior
Having children is a great feeling. However, most parents are concerned about why their children behave differently when they are raised in the same environment. We noticed that children's propensities are unique in relation to one another. Indeed, your one child treats you distinctively at various events. Most guardians are extremely disturbed about social changes in their kids. When they don't comprehend their children's insubordinate conduct despite their earnest attempts, they start to blame themselves. Nobody understands their child better than a parent. There are a couple of things to remember with regards to understanding children's conduct change.
This article covers the following aspects:
- Signs of behavior change in children
- Reasons for behavior change in children with their effects
- Management of children's behavioral change.
Signs of Behavior Change in Children
Children often change themselves from time to time. These changes may be temporary. The normal behavior of children depends on their age and physical and emotional development. A change in a child's behavior is common at one point or another. The main thing is how parents respond to these changes. This behavioral change may be harmful to the emotional, physical, and social well-being of the child. Kids practice these changes to express their emotions. Some of these changes are mentioned below:
- They easily become nervous.
- Throw temper tantrums.
- Break rules.
- Try to harm themselves.
- Irresponsive behavior.
- Show disrespectful behavior.
- Start lying.
Reasons of Behavioural Change in Children
To train your children well, you have to take care of their feelings and emotions. For example, when a child behaves strangely, it is important to know the reason behind it. If you see an abnormal change in your child, it means that something is going on in his mind. And to know that, you have to examine his daily routine. There may be reasons for this change, some of which are given below:
- Lack of verbal communication with the child.
- When parents don't meet their child's expectations.
- High expectations of parents.
- Lack of parental control.
Lack of Verbal Communication Between You and Your Child
Many parents expect their children to do things as they want without clearly communicating with them. This may be the root cause of your child's changing behavior. What happens is that your child does not understand exactly what you want. Children unknowingly do things you don't expect them to do. And you resent it because you have something else in mind. It can lead to delays in the language development of your child.
Effects of Poor Communication
- Poor communication can lead to weak emotional bonding and create distance and trust issues.
- Improper communication builds false assumptions.
- It can lead to sabotage of other efforts to deal with a child's problem.
- Parents with poor communication skills are less flexible towards their children, which leads to stubborn behavior in the children.
When Parents Don't Meet Their Child's Expectations
Children are very sensitive to certain things, like how much time their parents are giving them or how much parents live up to their expectations. And every parent, indeed, wants to give plenty of time, love, and affection to their child. And often, these expectations can lead to conflict between children and their parents. For example, a child excepts parents to involve him/her in family decision-making, and often, he/she is not involved in family discussions. This situation leads to a cold atmosphere at home.
- Unrecognized expectations can lead to conflicts between parents and children.
- Children may show rebellious behavior and defiance if their expectations are hurt.
- Kids stop expressing themselves when they find that their parents are not interested in listening to them.
High Expectations of Parents
Realistic expectations can increase the child's self-esteem. But having too many expectations sometimes destroys the relationship between parent and child. Putting unreasonable expectations on children can affect their emotions. According to a study published by the American Psychological Association, excessive parental aspiration can undermine a child's success. Most parents have high expectations of their children. And when they do not live up to their parents' expectations, they begin to think that there is nothing they can do. A sense of shame and disappointment develops in their minds, which leads to a chronic sense of low self-esteem.
Effects of High Expectations
- Having high expectations can lead to disappointment when children or parents fail to live up to those expectations.
- It can lead to emotional distress such as depression and anxiety.
- Placing too many expectations on a child can negatively impact a child's sense of self-worth.
- The child feels powerless and gives up easily.
Lack of Parental Supervision
Parental guidance and involvement are required to promote a child's self-esteem and emotional development. Parental supervision is a parenting technique that involves monitoring a child's activities. Monitoring children involves awareness of their friends, whereabouts, and free-time activities. Parental control is necessary to nurture the child's identity and has negative effects when not present. In this era, parents become too busy, and the child tries to seek attention by being aggressive. Lack of parental care and supervision leads to behavioral issues that negatively impact the course of a child's life.
- A child who grows up with a lack of parental supervision often has low self-esteem.
- Neglectful parenting causes children to lash out at others through violence.
- When children don't get enough attention, they turn to anti-social behaviors to remind their parents about them.
Leading Cause of Behavioral Change in Child
How to Manage the Behavioral Change of Child
Parents need to know how to improve their children's behavior. And to do that, parents must first understand themselves. Children are always attention-seekers. And they expect their parents to give them quality time. To build an ideal relationship with children, parents need to do their accounting. Are they giving their children as much time as they need? Do they properly care for children's feelings and needs? Are they ignoring children because of work? Learning better parenting techniques can help parents cope with the changing behavior of their children. Some tips are given below that can help with better parenting.
- Spending quality time with your kids.
- Making expectations clear.
- Choosing the right discipline strategies.
- Be a role model for your children.
Spending Quality Time With Your Kids
Spending quality time with your kids is important to keep them mentally and emotionally strong. Children whose parents give them time and attention have fewer behavioral issues at home and school. Parents can reinforce positive behavior with their appreciation. It creates a deeper bond between parents and children. Spending time with kids also helps them to feel secure and confident.
10 Parenting Tips to Calm Down a Child
Making Expectations Clear
Clarifying expectations helps ward off misunderstandings between you and your child. If you can't clearly articulate your expectations verbally, it will be hard for you and your child to build a cooperative relationship. For all of this, you have to understand what you want as a parent and what your child expects from you.
Choosing Right Discipline Strategies
Discipline means teaching a child about what is acceptable and unacceptable behavior. It's about testing and learning about boundaries. Choosing a suitable approach is essential for the behavioral management of children. The Types of discipline depend upon the ages of the children. For example, for babies, techniques like punishment or negative consequences don't work. They need love and care. Toddler behavior management strategies are different from babies'. Parents can set rules for a better relationship with their children.
Being a Role Model For Your Kids
Social learning theory explains that people learn by watching others. Children are always in the learning phase. They learn from others and try to express themselves in the same way. They always keep an eye on what you do. You may not notice, but they soak in all the information like a sponge. It won't be wrong to say that children are great imitators. So, give them something great to imitate. Parents strive to do their best to raise polite and successful kids. A child has no sense of right and wrong; they learn from their home environment and the people around them. Parents have a big role in shaping the behavior of their children.
- Helping kids identify and express feelings | Kids Helpline
- Discipline for children | Raising Children Network
- Managing Child Behavior Problems at Home | Child Mind Institute
- Parental Expectations | Psychology Today United Kingdom
- The impact of setting high expectations for your children | Alberton Record
This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.
© 2021 EK Jadoon