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60 Tips on How to Date an ENFP Personality

Andrea writes on various topics from dating, couples, astrology, weddings, interior design, and gardens. She studied film and writing.

ENFPs crave adventure, excitement, and ideas. An ENFP is an incredibly fun person to date. Sparks will fly.

ENFPs crave adventure, excitement, and ideas. An ENFP is an incredibly fun person to date. Sparks will fly.

Of all the personalities to date, ENFP is one of the most exciting and sweet types to get to know. It’s easy to get stranded in the wacky world of the ENFP (extroverted, intuitive, feeler, perceiver ); I created this guide to help you figure out how to approach this friendly soul.

Dating an ENFP

The ENFP is the champion personality. They love getting the chance to meet people, encourage them, and take on humanitarian issues. They have a never-ending pool of energy, and, sometimes, they struggle when they have to find their more quiet, introspective self.

This is one of the ultimate friends and romantic partners to have. They’ll have a million ideas, they’re eager to please, and they’re fast learners. They love falling in love and trying to figure someone out. This is why INFJ and INTJ personalities are so enticing to them because those two personalities exude a certain amount of mystery and depth.

The ENFP is warmhearted. They want to take on the entire world’s problems. If they don’t accomplish everything they want to do in one lifetime, they very well could live a second life to get those things done. They’re the life of the party, and if you can get them to settle down… they can be pensive and romantic.

60 Tips on How to Date an ENFP

1. Encourage the ENFP. Let them know they can be 100% real with you. They want to share all that energy they have, and a lot of people can’t handle it.

2. Open up your heart, open up your mind, and open up your schedule. ENFP types want to explore the world and with an incredible partner.

3. Your ENFP struggles when they get bored. Be willing to be creative. They probably started dating you because you’re creative. Try new things, go to new places, and change things up from time to time.

4. Take classes together with your ENFP. Learning something new will keep things alive and fresh. Take community classes for dancing, pottery, scuba diving, or whatever floats your boat.

5. Back to boredom — it’s not your job to constantly make an ENFP feel entertained. Bring in spontaneity, but trust me, you’re probably not the source of their boredom. Do what you can to encourage their curiosity of the world.

6. Expect loyalty from them. As long as you’re good about reminding the person that you love them, both in actions and words, they are pretty much eternally faithful. If they don’t feel loved…they might lose hope and begin to think the relationship has rotted.

7. Learn the art of conversation. The ENFP has a never-ending pool of conversational quests. Let it all come up naturally. You don’t always need to be serious or funny. Knowing you have a range to your emotions and ideas is attractive to an ENFP.

8. Edge closer to mysteriousness. ENFP has a strong, insatiable need to figure things out. A person who is unusual will keep them intrigued for years, decades, and into other lifetimes (if we get more than one life).

9. Always keep the compliments coming. You need to flatter the ENFP and speak to their ego.

10. Be absolutely undeniably adorable. Give them chocolates randomly. Give them flowers. Dance with them. Give them puppy dog eyes. Laugh, braid their hair, whatever!

11. “I love you” never loses meaning and is always good to hear. Be sincere with your words and tell them how you really feel.

12. Let them know you’re thinking about them when they’re not right there. People like knowing they were missed.

13. Write them letters. Put your heartfelt thoughts to pen and paper.

14. Cook them dinner. The stomach is the shortest way to the heart.

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15. An ENFP values authenticity. They want what is genuine. They have a great BS detector.

16. An ENFP loves to know they can take care of you, protect you, and that you’ll do the same. They thrive off mutual love.

17. Don’t get too upset with an ENFP for their messes. Gently help them to take care of things like dishes, dirty clothes, etc.

18. Let the ENFP know they’re amazing and on track with their life. Sometimes they feel like they have short-changed themselves.

19. An ENFP wants you to feel comfortable. They don’t want you to feel like you have to put on a performance for them. They want you to feel relaxed around them.

20. An ENFP likes being greeted with a hug. Physical contact/affirmation is a good idea.

21. An ENFP likes when you are close to them. Don’t be weird and distant.

22. An ENFP likes when you give them something nice to drink whether coffee, soda, or alcohol (you should keep the person’s preferences in mind).

ENFPs are often found outside enjoying nature. They really want a nature buddy.

ENFPs are often found outside enjoying nature. They really want a nature buddy.

23. An ENFP likes to teach you things. They want you to feel involved. They like to encourage people.

24. An ENFP just wants you to be there. Again, you don’t have to do a special song and dance for them.

25. An ENFP likes to be babied just a little bit, not too much. Hold them, rock them, whisper sweet things to them, etc.

26. Let an ENFP play with your pets or kids. They’re naturals when it comes to animals and children.

27. You can talk to them about anything. They like knowing your more private thoughts.

28. Suggest crazy things to do. They’re more creative and open-minded than some people. If you suggest something out of the norm they might take you up on it.

29. Call them when you miss them. Don’t go overboard, but they like knowing they’re missed.

30. An ENFP likes feeling like they’re a part of a powerful couple duo. Compliment the relationship.

31. Engage with and encourage them to be dramatic. The ENFP personality likes to perform a little bit. They don’t like to feel like they’re trapped in a box.

31. Wear something insanely nice and pleasing to the eyes. Appeal to the senses.

32. Surprise them with a vacation. ENFP types are always waiting for the next adventure.

33. Let them be totally, incandescently weird. ENFP isn’t really known for being normal. Let them come out of their shell.

34. You might annoy them with too lengthy of arguments. This personality tends to lock in on their favorite points and repeat them over and over.

35. An ENFP will move on quickly if they feel like nothing is progressing. Some personalities have reported that it’s strange how fast an ENFP can move on after a relationship. With certainty, they enjoyed their time with you, but they don’t want to be bogged down with a long unrequited romance. They’re smart enough to know when something isn’t working.

36. The ENFP likes to meet your friends and family. This is a naturally social person, so invite them to be around people you like.

37. Don’t toy with an ENFP. They want to know your genuine. If you’re playing childish mind games with them, they’ll cut their losses.

38. Don’t try to force things. A romance with an ENFP should unfold naturally.

39. They’re perfectionists and will do something till they get it right. If you are not of this temperament, this may make you crazy. If you are also a perfectionist, you should join them in their crazy crusade.

40. Don’t dote on them like a trophy in front of others. That will come off disrespectful.

41. An ENFP is an IDEALIST, don’t cramp their style with doom and gloom. Let them envision a greater world.

42. Give them undivided attention. Put down the phone and turn off the TV.

43. Spend time doing their favorite things. Make sure they’re still pursuing their hobbies and interests.

44. Motivate them. ENFP types love to motivate and be motivated.

45. Let them travel, wander the planet, or find a forest. ENFPs are often drawn to camping.

46. Don’t overwhelm them with a busy schedule. They’re extroverts, but they love their downtime.

47. Try to get them to clean with you. They’re not known for a love of cleaning, so try to do this with them.

48. Let them lead you. Let them be the boss sometimes.

49. Encourage their artsy-creative side. Whether through crafts, art, or music, the ENFP will be happier to have some kind of expressive outlet.

50. Play games with them that engage the mind. It’s good for them to practice their logic.

51. Make them homemade gifts. Bake them chocolates, weave them baskets, create furniture for them, etc.

52. Help them when they are weak. Solve problems for them. Be proactive.

53. Be weird with them. Don’t leave them hanging.

54. Try new food together. Branch out and try new things in your town.

55. Go to things that spark conversation, like graveyards. Sometimes you need to go to spooky places to make things interesting.

56. Do things you did as a child: build a sheet fort, design a scavenger hunt, or play with water guns. Appeal to the ENFP’s inner child. Sometimes a picnic in the rain and fighting with plastic swords is what the heart wants.

57. Go to events that celebrate the ENFP or matter to them — graduation, sporting events, big dinners, etc.

58. Take lots of pictures. You want to remember all the wild things you did together. Don’t forget to document your relationship.

60. Be good friends with the ENFP’s family. You’re headed toward a breakup if you can’t handle their family.

© 2015 Andrea Lawrence


Andrea Lawrence (author) on April 05, 2018:

I think you're trying really hard with external factors. You need to look within. Try meditation and prayer, even yoga on a regular basis. Your focus is so much on the external, that you're missing out on yourself. You're not too late and there is still plenty of time to develop and go after what you want. Try listening to some instrumental music you like by yourself, with headphones on, and imagine images to it. You need to spend time in reflection and see what you can find in introversion. If this starts to trouble you and is too much, go back to socializing. Don't make this more complicated than it needs to be. You're needing to get in synch without yourself and feel more balanced. Only when you take care of yourself, can you take care of others.

JonathanAbra on March 23, 2018:

Hi Andrea, I've had my whole life thinking that I'm strange or maybe sick in my head. Because I have so much power and sense to just be, Love to love everything alive and do not see bodies but more souls of different unity.

I've probably had more adventure than what a soul has been about, I've been struggling because it's more important for a fellow human being to survive his dramatic events than to take care of me. To me I get some kind of feeling that pleases all of me and can live on the one-day in days.

The prettiest smiles hide the deepest secrets

The prettiest eyes have cried the most tears.

The Kindest heart has felt the most pain.

But now to the problem. I'm stuck and do not get out of a bad loop. and the first time in my life, So start thinking about leaving this body. But then the other side is so strong that it wants to start appearing outside the sthlm. I want to change something in the world that will make it a better place. And I have a good plan but not at all enering.

All my life I have given to gain strength. But how to self-strength that can confirm one's own without the shape of any other life to be on the corner. How do I drive it power to just live in the present?

here is my mail.( Does anyone have suggestions or know where I might turn before it's too late? Infinite Gratitude / Jonathan A

Suad on November 02, 2017:

Thank you so much for this awesome insight

Eugene Tiffany on October 04, 2017:

What? Andrea, you say you are not sure where to even start writing about how to date an INTP? Wow! I didn't know that INTPs even dated, And I am one of them!

Andrea Lawrence (author) on June 28, 2017:

No problem! Glad to help. Perhaps I should do a how to date an INTP? I'm not sure where to even begin for this type.

Deborah Demander from First Wyoming, then THE WORLD on June 28, 2017:

Great article! As an ENFP, I have to say that this list is spot on. If my husband, who is an INTP, did any of these things, I would be over the moon. Thanks for understanding who we are, and writing this great article.


Andrea Lawrence (author) on March 26, 2017:


Lena from Philippines on March 18, 2017:

I am an ENFP and I totally agree with this

Vagabond Laborer on August 17, 2015:

Great hub! I know an ENFP and this was helpful.

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