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Emo Girls 101

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Emo girls. They are sexy, deep, and mysterious. Or are they fun, bubbly, and kind. Or perhaps they're whiny, needy, and full of drama? A lot of people think they know what emo girls are like. But the truth is that there are a lot of different personality types that join emo and emo itself is not even a clear term. But let’s explore “emo girls” anyway by hearing what the girls themselves and their friends have to say. Perhaps, if we can’t define “emo girls” we can get a clearer sense of the variety and make sense of the patterns we see.

Emo Girl


Some “emo girls” dress Flashy, some dress more Dark, what's going on?

“There's one uniting thread: emo girls are females who like the same style. They're diverse personality-wise. Everyone seems to think we all think we're being "unique" by dressing the same way, but seriously, we just like the style. There are woe-is-me emo kids, there are hyper-as-hell emo kids... approach it the same way you would any other girl but for the love of GOD don't refer to them as though they're an army of clones.”

This girl seems to base emo’s definition entirely on fashion, So in that case, she is talking about Scene girls. Traditional emos are actually more into the attitude and emo music. Scene girls go for fashion inspired by the emo look. So what do Scene girls look like and how can you tell them apart from emo girls? This is important to note because most people can’t tell the difference. Here is what one girl noted down in her observations of both:

Scene Girl


- Dark colors
- Stripes
- Converse sneakers
- Quiet
- Darker hair colors
- Lots of eyeliner
- Studded belts
- More band merch
- Black nail-polish

- Bright colors
- Ginormous hair
- Lots of colorful eye makeup
- Vans slip-ons
- Happy
- Colorful hair (Take for example the singer of Paramore, of which all those apply)
- Bandanas

It's like taking an emo and having Rainbow-Brite throw up on it.

- Skinny jeans
- Side bangs and/or straight across bangs
- Bows
- Dense amount of bracelets
- Various facial piercings
- Music

So scene girls typically have a more flamboyant way of dressing. They typically have more colorful, larger hair as well as more colorful clothing whereas Emo subculture girls tend to have flatter hair with more black colors all around. Of course, there is everywhere in between as well. One girl stated that she considered herself half emo and half normal.

They look so Skinny

They tend to be skinnier for two main reasons. One, if you are more traditionally emo, you eat less to get that more frail look. Scene, being inspired by emo, borrows that tight fitting look which only skinnier girls can pull off well. Another reason is because emo and scene tend to be vegan or vegetarian, and like many vegetarians who don’t carefully plan their diet, they get skinnier, because it is harder to find a variety of food. But keep in mind the internet is mostly going to show you sexy emo and scene girls. There are heavier emo/scene girls out there. But overall, on average, scene girls tend to be skinnier.

Emo girls are so Fun, Bubbly, and they are Kind ...

“Well i tell you what, I've talked to girls who dress like that and some of them are some of the nicest people you'll ever meet.”

Commentary: They say the scene girls tend to be more like this. But even more traditional emo girls who are more introverted and shy can have this side come out of them with someone they can relate to and trust.Like we discussed in Emo Love section, emos tend to feel every emotion deeper because they are right brained, so it would be no surprise to hear that a lot of them are compassionate towards other people.

Emo girls are so Overdramatic, Shy, and Sad – public perceive and personal experiences

From people who know emo girls:

“A lot of people don’t like emo girls…. Like they are dramatic and defensive and whine a lot and needy.”

“[About cutting]They do that because they let their anger out. I have never done that befoer but i have a lucky guess. I've seen a lot of emo's do that.”

There are some emos who are actually overdramatic and sad. Part of the emo culture does going beyond merely exploring feelings and into glamorizing bitterness and drama. So naturally, many people will join emo because they identify with the pain. But even if they do this, we need to have a more understanding attitude in order to help them. Read this section to see what some of them are going through.

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On an even deeper level, if they don’t have heart breaking stories they can share, maybe they had experiences as children they can’t remember. The point is that everyone has a reason for the way they are, and it is our job to help, not put others down to make ourselves feel better.

In terms of shyness, the s traditional emo mindset is more introverted because they spend a lot of time in their head exploring their feelings. But even introverted people can be very social. Especially one on one with people they know, they can talk your ear off. But the difference is that when talking to multiple people, they can tire easily and need to recharge. As for scene girls, since they just like the fashion, they may be extroverted and be comfortable with being social without tire.


Emo girls tend to have more Personality and Depth

From someone who know emo girls:

“I’ve dated a few emo girls and it’s great. I like [them]due to their attitude… it's more emotionally deep”

This might have some truth. A lot of girls relate to emo because of… well… the emotions and expressiveness. Therefore, these girls are probably more in touch with themselves, and thus, have more originality in their beliefs.

Emo girls are Easy

Some people… especially guys wonder this question, because of the way these girls dress. After all, emo girls have a lot of makeup and wear tight fitting clothes with wild hair. Here is what emo girls and the general public has to say.

From Emo/Scene girls themselves:

“im scene, and im not slutty. i flirt a lot, but that's just me and my personality. i don't generally find myself easy, actually quite the opposite! i need to have a great relationship with someone before i even dream about getting horizontal =]”

From people who know emo girls:

“One of my best friends is scene. Shes not slutty at all. She is the most funny and coolest person to hangout with. Sadly, there are a lot of slutty girls, whether they are scene or not.”

“A few of my friends (ok... 2) are scene/emo/goth, and well, not all of them are particularly slutty.”

“Well I've dated a couple of scene girls (one of em' was REALLY scene) and they weren't slutty at all!”

“I really hate to be stereotypical here, but I'm speaking from personal experience. I used to be a part of the emo/scene crowd and I found that most of the girls... how do I say this... they were "easy" to say in the nicest way. They seem to have an edge to them and guys maybe think or know that they can get with her easily.”

I think from all of this, it is pretty clear that there is not much correlation since there are plenty of people to vouch for emo girls having a sense of value. About that last girl’s comment about them being easy, it’s possible that some girls into scene to get attention and sleep around more. In addition, there are plenty of self respecting girls who are not easy but choose to be more promiscuous. Either way, based on various testimonies, such “easy” girls are probably a minority. So overall, it looks emo girls are not really any easier than normal girls.

Emo girls are somewhere in between all of these things

"my friends call me emo.. my bf is pretty well-rounded lol.. i guess it's more of personality for me rather than looks or what type of image the guy portrays... not all "emo" girls are the same.. i guess im more on the half emo half "normal" type of girl."

I think this shows that there is much more variety among girls than stereotypes suggest. It’s just like how some people are kinda agnostic as opposed to full on Atheist or Christian.


So what can we make of everything we just discussed? If anything, it should get rid of the stereotype that there is such a thing as one type of emo girl. Instead, it should help you gain some insight into their subculture and appreciate the variety of so called emo girls.

With this in mind, I think it is okay to explore their commonalities because it is intriguing. Emo girls can be mysterious, colorful, and beautiful in their many expressions. Maybe it’ll motivate you to go interact with them and see for yourself how they really are.

To learn more about the emo sub-culture, such as the history of emo, romance between emo, their fashion, music, and more, please check out: Emo Fever


Edin on May 12, 2014:

Whos that girl with the elvis chain?? Maaaan

Miss Cierra cx on March 25, 2013:

well all i can say

Emo: emotional,nice,tend to take things more than others personaly,hurt easily,not suicidal (some are and then some arnt)

Scene: Funny,colorful,nice,happy,hyper,talkitive (some emos are more reserved and don't talk unless they have to and tend to stay away from big crowds)

i have friends who are scene there nice people

and then

Scemo: its a mix of being emo and scene u wear bright things or dark

mostly emo kids tend to wear clothes that fit how they are feeling and listen to music that explains what there feeling A lot of emo and scene kids are here because they know that its ok to look different and be yourself and im bisexual and a lot of my friends are to one of my friends is transgender but some of us "Scemo" kids are more like "call me what u want i don't give a fuck don't like me? don't care that's your opinion" and to me that's what i feel and a lot of ppl don't understand emo kids with cutting here's what cutting is

Cutting: its when kids cut because that's the last thing they know how to show people there upset they show you sighns there depressed and its like people don't listen so they turn to the last thing they know

edwa3d=emo2 on November 20, 2012:

it cool being emo cuz im emo to i play my guitar some times but im learning how to play and also i have awsome hair for be emo lol

emosh on June 10, 2012:

i have been called emo because of the way i act ....I like an emo I just need some ask out tips that's it

Misanthrope on May 04, 2012:

People are so stupid on the subject and ignorant to say that emo people are just trying to get attention and cutting is about getting attention. Emo(short for emotion/emotional) people just feel things a lot more and explore those feelings as stated in the article. As for cutting, each person has their own reasons for doing it(some may do it for attention but I don't believe that is the case with most).

I just think its such bull**** how people judge others based on their personal style instead of their personality and who they are. Don't be lazy, get to know people before you go judging them based on appearances!

HannahHawk on May 02, 2012:

I'm scene ........@Jessica you can be either one you want but the way you dress is a big part of it I tried being emo at first,but my friends said I was more bright colors than dark colors so I tried being scene and it fit me more so try both and see which one fits you d[^_^]b

Shannerz on April 08, 2012:

LOL, Haiiii

ramu chauhan on April 03, 2012:

mc photo to dal

taytayomg123 on March 29, 2012:

i have been called emo because of the way i act and the music ilistento.. i would like to pick up the style.. but my clothes don't fit it.. is there a way i can make my clothes work?

emo babe on March 22, 2012:

to me i think all emote girls just want attention just saying but you have to admit i'm right about that

Vanessa on February 23, 2012:

I'm Emory and I'm not slutty either are my friends.

Nessa on February 16, 2012:

Nice hair LOVE IT

d-d-d-d-drop the bass on January 27, 2012:

I accept any type of human being as long as they accept me for who I am. I am dating an emo girl who fills me with joy when ever I am around her. I love her and her joyful personality! I am actually thinking about popping the big Q soon here, but i am not sure how to go about it.

Jessica Colquitt on January 20, 2012:

Hi! I'm 12 and I was wandering which one am I? I love Dark colors and some light, I don't dress either way, I Feel Like Crying almost every day, I have tried to cut myself but it didn't work ( I have tough skin), Everytime I take one of those Personality Quizzes I get either Emo, Goth, Scene, or Bubbly, and there is a whole lot mor that I am not going to mention. Also one more thing is that I dream and daydream about my own death and have thought about well... you know but I'm a christian so I know that god won't let me in heaven if I do that. One more thing, is it weird to be scared of pain but yet want to have a very painful Death?

lEtIcIA bEe Me on January 20, 2012:

im scene nd i nvr give a damn bout wat ppl say nd i dnt get y ppl that hate my ppl be saying shyt they can go stick that shyt up there ass but not out in the internet inbisuls!!!!!xD

Ilikeemo on January 15, 2012:

I'm emo and I like an emo I just need some ask out tips that's it

denise martinez on December 20, 2011:

imm emo but i would like to look like heer

Bryanee on November 28, 2011:

im a emo girl :/

john on November 23, 2011:

the girl with no shirt on, holding the sigh is pretty. Would love to poke her belly button

bicthesdatdaiss on November 20, 2011:

wow this is weird

Em0B0Y on October 29, 2011:

Emo girls are so hott wanna kiss them:)

Alizéeee on July 01, 2011:

Bravo >.

Alizéeee on July 01, 2011:

Wich is designed website ?

john on June 20, 2011:

they're all very pretty. Wonder if the girl with the sign has an outie belly button.

Abby411 on June 15, 2011:

I'm emo!!!!!!! I'm not slutty at all!!!!! And comment on cutting ... It's actually fun!!!!;)

... on June 11, 2011:


Hey :)

Where did you get the last picture from?

I've been talking to a girl and that is one of her pic, did you get it off of someone?

yic17 (author) from Los Angeles on May 31, 2011:

@john honestly, I don't see the emo subculture to be any different to other subcultures. I believe that many people today (especially teenagers) are confused about life and they simply want to feel they belong somewhere. that is why they join groups and have a certain style to shape their individuality or identity. doesn't matter if it's emo, goth, glam, hip hop, or whatever subculture.

I think on average, it is about creating a sense of identity. without identity, one feels insecure and confused with no direction. identity can give people a sense of direction (which translates to power and the ability to make decisions and self confidence). though this sense of power is not ultimately real. since identity is simply a part of people's ego which is only one part of you - not the whole.

anyways, if you want to learn more about the ego vs. self - it gets very deep. and you'd want to study both psychology and spirituality.

john on May 31, 2011:

I wanna say, this article is really well written. It goes into some decent depth on the differences between scenes and emos, and I'm really glad it gives the individual a personality and not just the group itself.

I have a small question though. Not as individuals, but on average, do you think part of the fashion, attitude and lifestyle emos carry stems from a realization of an inner incompletion, or is it merely a way of approaching life based on the depression itself? (Im not really emo, so I wouldn't really know.)

Thanks again for a good article.

liquidk on May 08, 2011:

i honestly think everybody should get treated the same but since emo girls so much about feelings etc i want to be there for each one i think anger discomfort sadness hate should not exist to them i only want happyness to exist to these girl i am going out with an emo girl and everything she does i agree with because i only want her to be happy my actions are based on your happyness she honestly thought that guys like me didn't exist any more

bolla on March 24, 2011:

Why is the Scene girls sooo skinny? HOW?

stephinie on March 24, 2011:

i happen to be emo but im hard to get i break guys hearts but im not slutty

Charlie on March 23, 2011:

I think it's okay i just don't like the part about emos let there emotions out by cutting . I think people just do it fro attention to think they are emo . People overazagurat about cutting . people thin "oh well I ghad a bad bad , the world is gunna end . oh no , ima go slit my wrist .

I am not saying this is trure for ALL people .

Kammkamm on March 17, 2011:

First shirt is suicide silence I believe

Ol rocka on March 15, 2011:

I met 2 emos so far. One is the awesomest chick I have ever met in my life. A half way between introvert and extrovert. Met her through friends of friends so that is why this ol rocker is friends with this chick. I know about what shes been through, and shes also listened and UNDERSTOOD what I have been through which is hell. Its why we are best friends. If I could give her heaven I would.

Then there is another emo chich I knew before her, in 2007. She is the utmost worst human being I have ever met. Not even her own parents like her! I loved her and I still do, but now its love/hate because shes that much of an a**. I hope someone shoots her. I hate her that much. One less feelings hurter in this world. I hate her and I hope she dies in pain from the same pain she caused me by someone else who finds out her true colors one day. And they arent emo colors, they are sh*t colors.

lastDyinggRose(Brandii on February 28, 2011:

I am glad this website was made. Maybe now people will stop tretaingg us(me) Like trash with scars. Each Scar represents something i went through alone. I'm Emo/scene. And Most of this is true, But Im Not always depressed, Or Moping about like a sad lonley sack; I have an Awesome Boyfriend(also emo/skater) amazing friends(all emo/scence and a few prepps) and my loving fam(ily)I'm a bubbly person Widd a great sweet personality, good grades, and Im a loving sisterr of 13(all youngerr) I wish people would stop and relize We do feel things too.. but this is just how me and Most of my friends are treated..We pretty much Live in redneck territory. but this is Just My opinion and How I see it. But Im glad Im not the only one.(:

yic17 (author) from Los Angeles on December 29, 2010:

@Bird is the Word - Emo is actually not a very new trend. it started in 80s as punk music. its music is pretty much punk except more about personal issues rather than political. it was very small back then so not many people talk about it. it wasn't until around 2000 that emo bands started to have its own unique fashion style - similar to goth except more modern .. modern goth if you will. that's when emo started to become more popular and nowadays people usually refer emo as a style rather than music. but originally, Emo is a music sub-genre of punk.

Bird is the Word on December 29, 2010:

Interesting, but it's not my generation. I wonder are trends like this a rehash from the past with very little new?

mikia on December 24, 2010:

Well I love dark color. I cut myself and I'm very shy and don't talk. Everyone calls me emo. But its who I am and I can't help it. Some people think I'm stupid for cutting myself but its the only way I can fill things. Ill I ask is stop thinking were dumb or stupid and let us live our lives like we like.

victoria on December 10, 2010:

hey laura tell trent i lve yall

DarkyLacrimosa on November 14, 2010:

i hate emo-scene!

askalera on October 13, 2010:

freakin hair stylist"""""""""


love your stylessss

long hairs

Pvt. Perales on October 11, 2010:

I freakin love emo girls!!!

yic17 (author) from Los Angeles on October 09, 2010:

yep, I just checked, it's NOT Bill Kaulitz. Bill's skin color is darker, has tattoos on his body, and has a six-pack. the pic I posted is definitely a girl's body.

yic17 (author) from Los Angeles on October 09, 2010:

musicalrider .. eh .. you sure that's Bill Kaulitz? I know who Bill Kaulitz is .. the lead singer of Tokio Hotel .. I don't think that's him .. looks like a girl to me.

musicalrider on October 09, 2010:

that last photo at 'Emo girls tend to have more Personality and Depth' the picture is of a guy. His name is Bill Kaulitz

deamonkiller on August 10, 2010:

looking for a girldfriend. must be 14-16 years old.

Lindsay D. on August 08, 2010:

First, your article was great! Dead on. Lot's of people get confused about the difference. Anyway, I would like to comment on two comments: the first is the comment by ashlei 5 months ago. Goth has been around since 1982 I know, I started out goth and turned punk as it fit my personality much better as did the style of clothing and music. So I wonder how is it that a youngster like you can say the the Emo kids call goths posers when they've been around many years before Emo kids. Plus, goth is very different from Emo. Goths are into totally different music, dress, and personality. Second: the comment by Emyleah 7 weeks ago. From the begining of time, any true punk, or subculture alternative personality (goth, emo, scene, punk, etc.) has gone through that "don't label me, labels are for posers" attitude. The fact is we are all making a statement through dress for the way we feel inside or the things we like, and who cares if someone puts a label on it. Everything has a lable. You like T.U.K. shoes, but not knock offs right? Well your relying on labeling to get you to the right shoe you want right? If we didn't have labels how would we sort things out? Like food labels, each has a list of ingrediants. Like people, for example mayonnaise, best foods or kraft, we compare the ingrediants and choose which one we want. If its the same, we just grab a jar, but its still @$%& mayonnaise. Don't trip youngster. Just be who you are, don't waste your time trying so hard to be an "individual" you already are, or bagging on others who accidently call you emo or scene or punk or goth or gay or weird or normal or whatever. Me, personally, I judge an individual by getting to know them and they simply fall into a category in my own mind without even really caring about it much or making a big deal about "labeling" them. I either like you, or I don't, like your style, or I don't, etc. I'm an 82' punk and I've been told I fall into the sub-catagory of a "pogo" punk. I could care less really, but I am who I am. Just be yourself, hang with your true friends, and do what you do. After 23 years "in the scene" I'm still a punk and probably always will be. I've paved my way, gained my reputation, and now I just kick back and enjoy the ride. I wish I knew then what I know now and maybe I wouldn't have wasted so much time on @#$& trying to get here.

yic17 (author) from Los Angeles on July 30, 2010:

hey DEMON, thanks for the comment. will keep your advice in mind when hooking up with emo girls XD

"DEMON" on July 30, 2010:

i have dated over 20 emo/scene girls in my 18 years and i will say not one is slutty at all...they just are after a guy because just like myself(and i am not emo) i feel the need to feel needed to someone who loves me... in fact i personally feel that most emo girls are actually the easiest to impress...just love them and never leave their side...done...hook, line, and sinker

Emo Girl on July 10, 2010:

luv the site and all emo girl

yic17 (author) from Los Angeles on July 06, 2010:

mr noodle, are you commenting about the article? did you even read the article? I think you'll find that my opinion is the same as yours ...

mr noodle on July 05, 2010:

why is there so much controversy over something like the way people dress or do their hair, as well as the way they act. Being different id what gives flavor to the world and everyone has to the right to express themselves, it being artistically or physically. But every one's in titled to their own opinion so it can't be helped

I say if you have nothing good to say don't say it at all, and by the way i'm just your everyday normal guy and i have decency to just let people be, instead of talking a load of crap about a specific sub culture

eymi on June 22, 2010:

omg meine mam lässt mich kein emo sein

nicht mal die frisur

Emyleah on June 19, 2010:

anyone that calls themselves scene or emo is a fake, they're just looking for attention.

Scene kids don't go around label themselves they're expressing themselves and the public label them. Anyone that labels themselves are just whay fake. its real sad how you want to be 'scene' so much. be yourself!

scene queen on May 30, 2010:

im a scene girl!! :)

Matt on April 16, 2010:

does anyone know of the girls name in the first one, i swear shes some model

yic17 (author) from Los Angeles on April 11, 2010:

Baby B, the article explains the differences between emo and scene girls .. and yes, they are very different like I wrote in the article. but to majority of the people, they don't know there's a difference and they think they're the same. well, that's why I explained in the article their differences. but not only are emo and scene girls different - even emo girls or scene girls amongst themselves are different. afterall, they share certain similar elements but each person is still a unique individual in the end.

Baby B on April 11, 2010:

i think ur mixing scene and emo together and there totrally different..i was both at 1 point or another

selena1221 on April 02, 2010:

i'm emo and that really described our appearance and attitudes, but not the question that most people ask. they don't understand why most emo kids self-harm, and they shun us for their lack of knowledge. i'm sorry, but i don't think that's right.

yic17 (author) from Los Angeles on March 11, 2010:

Jo, of course you don't have to be emo to let your emotions out. Everyone finds ways to let their emotions out everyday. Emo is simply a sub-culture that "emphasizes" on showing emotions and self expression. In a way, you can say when one person is in the emo sub-culture, it gives them a sense of freedom to show emotions and express themselves within their emo group because it's not only accepted - it's expected.

While in another sub-culture, for example: Star Wars fanboys, they don't emphasize on showing emotions or self expression. They emphasize more about Star Wars knowledge and role playing. It's accepted in that sub-culture to role play and talk with alien or Jedi language.

I think that is the whole point of sub-cultures - different rules and expectations.

jo on March 11, 2010:

sorry but i don't have to be an emo to let emotions out

FiNe SiZe bEtO SiZeD on March 08, 2010:

WeLl iN a WaY ThEy dU LoOK SlUTtY Bu mAnY Of tHeM R VeWy bOoTIfUl:)i

ashlei on February 15, 2010:

wow i must say that was almost to the point .. i say this because i have been told but emo and scene its nothing alike scene is how a person expresses them self . they do it to say yea im different and your point is !!

emos are just people that generally hate life and want to not be in this world(die) i say this ony from experience !

yes emos for the most part if your emo you cut or your cositer a goth(a poser to the emos)

but they also cut to get attention to some degree.

scenes are just bubbly kids that like who they are and don't give a damn to what people say they are just different

NOTE: i am not emo i am scene i went through the hole emo stage every one does it all depends on how you yourself express your emotions i am naturaly a strange obsured individual who think that preps and every one wish they were able to have the guts to wear bright colors and say look at me !

note i am not EASY!!!

shiarane on November 04, 2009:

ur very good i love ittttt!!!!!!!!!

SarahJParkins on September 30, 2009:

What is the band on the shirt of the girl in the first picture? Looks so familiar but most of the logo is obscured.

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