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Dumb and Dumber- In Idaho a box of chocolates given must weigh 50lbs or more, and more unusual laws in the U.S. part 3

You'll never guess where you shouldn't pee when you're in Illinois!

We’re beginning with Idaho today. I may have to do more than one law from each state, as I can’t seem to control myself once I get started.

The thought that keeps going through my mind as I read these is “What the hell was going on at the time that made the lawmakers feel as though they needed to make this law?”

I can’t imagine that a city councilman just randomly asked for a law to be passed that made sure no one could fish from the back of a giraffe. (Idaho law) Something had to have happened. Did his brother-in-law break into the local zoo and take a giraffe out to dinner, a movie, and some night fishing? Did his wife ask for a giraffe to fish off of for her birthday? Did a giraffe donate a ton of money to the lawmaker’s re-election campaign… along with a nod and a wink? I would love, love, love to know!

I’m going to attempt to answer this question on the laws I choose today. If you have any ideas as well, and I’m sure you do, feel free to let me know. If you actually know why these laws were made-keep it to yourself. It’s like magic, once you know, the mystery is gone and it’s no fun. Just kidding. You can tell us. We’ll call you names, but deep down we’ll be happy for the knowledge. At least some of us will.

Idaho:

A man cannot give his sweetheart a box of chocolates weighing less than 50 pounds.

What happened? I’m thinking this was either a councilwoman who was tired of getting the 4-piece sample box of chocolates for Valentine's Day; or (and I believe this to be more likely) this was a man who wanted an excuse not to give his sweetheart chocolates… ever. “Honey, I looked and looked, but no one makes a box of chocolates over 50 pounds. It’s not my fault. It’s the dang ol’ law!"


Illinois:

The English language may not be spoken.

What happened?The congressman’s wife knew only one language. He was tired of hearing her yap.


In Normal, IL, it is unlawful to make faces at a dog.


What happened? I’m going to go out on a limb here. It’s normal, Illinois. People might not think making faces at a dog is considered normal. I think it is. I make faces at my dog all the time. My dog makes faces back. It’s our thing, and it’s normal. Get a grip, Illinois.


In Champaign, Illinois it’s illegal to pee in your neighbor’s mouth.


What the hell? I just heard a collective “ewwww”. Yeah, well I didn’t write it, I’m just reporting it. You do have to really wonder about this law. Especially since the law was written in CHAMPAIGN. I don’t want to begin to envision the scenarios that may have led up to the writing, debating, and passing of this law. I’ll let you figure out this one.


Indiana:

The value of pi is 3.

What happened? I actually think I may know the answer to this one for realsies. I grew up in Indiana, and while I love my state, I would be lying to say our schools were top notch, or middle notch, or even a notch. We had a sign in front of our school that read “Slow School”… and we meant it. Decimals were not taught so much as suggested. They must have gotten tired of suggesting, and dropped the .14. It makes all kinds of sense.



In Indiana one may also not sniff glue. This was a favorite pastime of students and teacher’s alike. Hence the whole “pi” thing



Iowa:

One must obtain written permission from the City Council before throwing bricks into a highway.


What happened? The City Councilmen were bored with all their boring boringness and wanted some excitement. By making people obtain permission to throw the bricks, the Council could legally get a piece of the action.

Kansas:

No one may scream at a haunted house.

What happened? If you notice the law says no one may scream “at” the haunted house, not “in” the haunted house. This one is obvious. A haunted house, with a lot of extra cash, got tired of kids screaming, “You’re a scary house!” Now they can’t. Well, they can, but they’ll be hauled off to jail. Way to go Haunted House!


Also in Kansas:

The installation of bathtubs is prohibited.


What happened? I’m going to go out on a limb here, and assume there were a bunch of dirty congressmen; kind of reminds me of modern times.


Kentucky:

Throwing eggs at a public speaker could result in up to one year in prison.

What happened? I thought this was a little tough, until I saw that it was repealed in 1975… just in time for President Gerald Ford. Coincidence? I think not.


Louisiana:

It is illegal to shoot lasers at police officers.


What happened? I’m going to assume there were some pretty embarrassed police men when they peed on themselves after being shot with a Star Trek laser gun set on “stun”. Now, if it had been set on “kill”, they wouldn’t have had to be so embarrassed. Those things are wicked scary on "kill".


Maine:

You may not step out of a plane in flight.

What happened?I’ve lived in northern Maine. As sad as it may seem, this law actually needed to be made. I still wipe a tear from my eye when I think of all the lives that could have been saved had this law only been passed sooner.


And the last one for today…

Maryland:

It is illegal to take a lion to the movies.


What happened?You might think this is an odd law, yet if you think about it..., ok, it’s still an odd law. I believe the ratio of lions to single men in Maryland is quite high. There was a group of young men tired of being upstaged by the lion and his fluffy mane who got this law passed. Tired, and also a little frightened. The few who actually managed to get dates lost them during the movie credits. We're not sure what happened exactly, but the lions that were there looked pretty happy. Happy and full. It was a tough time to be single in Maryland before they finally passed this important law.



That’s it for today. I see that Massachusetts is coming up next. That state may take an entire hub for their dumb laws! Until next time, stay up to date, and try to stay out of jail!

This is the site where I found this information. I only used a few of the laws, there are TONS more on this site for each state!

Check out part 1 of dumb laws, by sueroy333 and go from there. Bring some popcorn and stay awhile.

Hubs on dumb laws by drbj. Be sure and check them out. She's got lots of stuff I missed, and her sense of humor is awesome!

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Comments

Susan Mills (author) from Indiana on April 15, 2012:

Sweet. Are you a politician? You totally have this law thing down! Thanks for all the great comments! :)

Joanna McKenna from Central Oklahoma on April 13, 2012:

If I read the KS law correctly, it's illegal to INSTALL a bathtub, but NOT illegal to have one as long as it's not connected to anything. Well, what do expect for a state that only recently repealed the law that required a person walk in front of an automobile entering a "populated place"! The walker's other duty was to warn horse riders and buggy drivers to be aware the motorized vehicle behind him MIGHT scare the horses.

Making fishing off a giraffe illegal is an easy one. From the back of a giraffe, a fisherman could SEE the fish and know where to throw his line.

Obviously, the idiot that made jumping out of a plane illegal didn't own the local sky-diving business...or didn't grasp how hard it is to arrest a parachuteless jumper after he/she hits the ground...

Voted up, funny AND awesome! ;D

Susan Mills (author) from Indiana on February 11, 2011:

Susan- I'm pretty broke. I'm glad to know where to go to get sloshed, thrown in jail, and sloshed again! That could totally come in handy!

I'd say I was sorry for corrupting you, but I'm enjoying your research, so, selfishly, I'm completely not sorry!

Susan Zutautas from Ontario, Canada on February 10, 2011:

Another Canadian Law This one I really Like makes sense to me anyways....

Theres a law on the British Columbia books that states if you ‘ re a bankrupt drunk who got thrown into jail, the law requires the jailer to bring you a bottle of beer on demand.

Hope you are happy see what you have done Sue .... You have me looking up these dumb laws now..Thanks love your hubs!

Susan Mills (author) from Indiana on January 23, 2011:

mysterylady- do not get me started on the "new zodiac"!

They say I'm no longer a Capricorn. I refuse to be a Sagittarius now matter what they say.

So now I say I'm now a unicorn. Take THAT zodiac people!

PS. Tell your lion I love him too. He looks so cute all curled up in your pocket eating chocolate!

mysterylady 89 from Florida on January 23, 2011:

Thank you, sueroy, for commenting on my hubs. My lion and I love you. Btw, I am a Leo, at least according to the old Zodiac.

Susan Mills (author) from Indiana on January 23, 2011:

mysterylady- Ghirardelli chocolate squares are great.. the ones with carmel in the middle are practically pornographic! I can see why your lion loves them.

I actually had read quite a few of yours, I just checked and saw that I hadn't commented. I will rectify that here in a few minutes! Deep apologies.

mysterylady 89 from Florida on January 23, 2011:

I used to love Milk Duds, but now I am addicted to Ghirardelli chocolate squares. There is one filled with caramel, another filled with peanut butter. Yummy! My pet lion loves them, too.

Btw, I have been reading quite a few of your hubs. Why not pay me a visit and read some of mine? My latest is too long and rather serious, but I have several humorous ones.

Susan Mills (author) from Indiana on January 23, 2011:

mysterylady- Maybe bringing Milk Duds to the movies will help you forget about the lion in your pocket since they're your favorite treat!

They are really awesome. I love the way they stick to my teeth and pull my fillings out... it's so worth it.

mysterylady 89 from Florida on January 23, 2011:

I had not thought of Milk Duds in years! They used to be my favorite movie treat.

Susan Mills (author) from Indiana on January 22, 2011:

Mysterylady- thank you for stopping by. Since you took the time to comment I will pass this secret on to you... you can sneak your pet lion into the movies. It's not too difficult, just stick him in your purse and don't let on.. wait a second, I may be thinking about Milk Duds.

mysterylady 89 from Florida on January 22, 2011:

While I am all for the 50-pound box of chocolates law, I really am disappointed I cannot take my pet lion to the movies. Thanks for the laughs!

Susan Mills (author) from Indiana on January 13, 2011:

Donna- thank you for your kind comment. I always LOVE it when I know I made someone laugh... especially out loud! What a great compliment! Thank you so much!!!

Donna Janelle from Oklahoma on January 13, 2011:

Haha I LOVE this! Your writing always cracks me up, and I love the scenarios that you came up with to explain the laws...litterally had me laughing out loud!

Susan Mills (author) from Indiana on January 11, 2011:

Drjb- yes, I see I was completely wrong. Of course you couldn't intimidate a fly if you tried.

The fly would see your confidence, your assertiveness, and perhaps your orangy-black belt and simply raise a glass in toast to a woman who lacked the ability to intimidate... while walking quickly backward looking for escape. :O)

You are an amazing person. I'm sure I am not speaking just for myself when I say I feel lucky to be learning from such an un-intimidating person as yourself. :O)

Susan Mills (author) from Indiana on January 11, 2011:

Qudsia- ohh, do be careful. I think there may be a low against that!

drbj and sherry from south Florida on January 11, 2011:

Hi, Sue, thank you for the links. Obrigada.

But INTIMIDATING? Moi? Never. Assetive, yes. Confident, yes. But otherwise, just a sweet, little old lady with an orange "black" belt.

QudsiaP1 on January 11, 2011:

I almost died from laughing.

If I do actually die, it is all on you. :P

Susan Mills (author) from Indiana on January 10, 2011:

Feline- Thank you so much for coming by and commenting! I realized when I saw your comment that I had forgotten to put a link to the site where I got this great stuff! Thank you so much!

I also forgot to put drbj's hub links on here as well. I'm going to go fix that now. Drbj wrote several hubs on this same subject, I'm sure you'll find her hubs interesting as well. She also covered dumb world laws... totally outrageous!

The links will be right above the comments. There are tons of good laws I didn't use, there were just too many of those boogers! I'd have been writing "dumb laws" hubs for the next few years!

Feline Prophet on January 09, 2011:

Hahaha, where do you find these! :)

Susan Mills (author) from Indiana on January 09, 2011:

Pop-you deserve a PIP- I've seen where you throw your bricks. Excellent targets and excellent aim!

breakfastpop on January 09, 2011:

Wow, I throw bricks all the time. It's fun!

Susan Mills (author) from Indiana on January 08, 2011:

Gus- I'm glad to know you can still take your nits to the movies. I was actually concerned about that! Whew!

I agree with you though. We should only go to the movies in Indiana where you can sniff glue and repeat pi over and over. (3,3,3,3,3,3--I've been practicing.)

Gustave Kilthau from USA on January 08, 2011:

sueroy - Well, that does it for Maryland ! Such discriminatory laws that don't permit taking your pet lions to the cinema. You can take elephants, monkeys, girlfriends, and boyfriends. Doggone nit-picking law. Hey, you can even take your nits to the show. Disgraceful law.

Gus :-)))

Susan Mills (author) from Indiana on January 08, 2011:

Drbj- I believe you totally. The stone ages were a happy and carefree time. A time when neighbor helped neighbor. A time when neighbor befriended neighbor. A time when neighbor would have chopped off an arm and run it over with a square, stone wheel, before peeing in his neighbor's... anything.

How sad that times changed to the point that the peeing in spots not intended for pee became so prevalent that this law had to be written, debated (strongly, no doubt) and finally passed.

Ahh, the good old stone-age days. When the only thing your neighbor would try to put in your mouth was some homemade cookies.

Oh, it also could be that no one dared violate this law because of the intimidation factor. I have this feeling you can be VERY intimidating when you choose to be. :)

Susan Mills (author) from Indiana on January 08, 2011:

Bucky- you are so welcome. Now, he may say, "Oh, but honey they don't make 50lb boxes of chocolates." I've thought about this, here's what you do.

Have a large, empty, box ready (clean and lined with tissue paper preferably) and tell him, "Yes, but if you pour 100 eight-ounce boxes of chocolate in here... we're all good."

Then get a small box and send me a few for a consulting fee. :)

Susan Mills (author) from Indiana on January 08, 2011:

Chris- I'm totally lmao! Actually, I fow-lmao (fell over while laughing my...)

I knew in my heart the "pi" dictate would drive you to throwing bricks. I didn't consider that it might drive you even further!

I'm not surprised California law trumped everyone else's. That's California for you. Of course, in your favor is the fact that you obviously know pi and a "bit".

drbj and sherry from south Florida on January 08, 2011:

I once went to school in Champaign/Urbana, Illinois (U of Illinois) back in the Stone Age, and I can personally vouch, sue, that no one, not one person, dared to violate that remarkable 'peeing' law. Trust me.

sunflowerbucky from Small Town, USA on January 08, 2011:

As an Idaho gal myself, I have to say the chocolate law is not a bad one, and I am going to have to make it my civic duty to make sure my husband understands the serious implications if he does not abide by this! Thank you so much for bringing this important matter to my attention!

Susan Mills (author) from Indiana on January 08, 2011:

Tammy- I'm lmao! I love it. Everything is clear to me now. It makes perfect sense. After harvest, the people from Idaho have all these extra "not-quite-perfect" potatoes, what to do, what to do? Cover them with chocolate! Excellent deduction!!!

Mentalist- I heard from a little birdie that your application has been approved. I put in a good word from you to hurry it along. I told them you have excellent brick-throwing skills. Now, don't let me down! :)

Susan Mills (author) from Indiana on January 08, 2011:

Austin- you made me say "ewww" out loud! LOL!

barbergirl- thank you for stopping by and for the nice comment! It does make you wonder. I think all states should have a "clean up day" where they get rid of outdated laws, lord knows they need to make room for all of the NEW dumb laws they're making!

Pixienot from Clarksville, Indiana on January 08, 2011:

The English language must not be spoken! That settles it; I'm not visiting Illinois. I know no other language except pig Latin.

I'm looking forward to the next Dumb and Dumber. Thanks.

ChrisLincoln from Orange (or Lemon...) County, California on January 08, 2011:

Sue,

You knew the pi thing would drive me nuts didn't you? I'd have been OK with three and a bit, but three? I got so angry I ate a whole 50lb box of chocolates, then in a sugar haze ended up peeing in my neigbors...yard and throwing bricks into the street.

I made bail though, apparently California Law trumps all other laws, but I have 200 hours of mandatory counselling to do now...

3.14159265358979323846264338327950288419716939937510...

Mentalist acer from A Voice in your Mind! on January 08, 2011:

I'm still waiting for my permit to throw bricks to be approved,lol.;)

Tammy L from Jacksonville, Texas on January 07, 2011:

Idaho's 50lb box of chocolates law kinda makes sense. They don't have chocolate covered cherries. They have chocolate covered potatoes.

Stacy Harris from Hemet, Ca on January 07, 2011:

Ha ha - I love the stupid laws some of these states make. Kind of maks you wonder! Great hub... look forward to more!

Lela from Somewhere near the heart of Texas on January 07, 2011:

Oh, wow, I haven't peed in someone's mouth in a month of Sundays! I forgot how much fun that was. Of course, since I live in Texas, it's not illegal so open wide!

Valentine's day is coming up, so I need to put some affiliate links on Austinstar.com so Idahoans can purchase 50lb boxes of chocolate. Thanks for the tip!

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