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Archimedes our CRAZY Muscovy Duck

muscovy_duck

God surely laughed - we own a Muscovy duck!

Oh, the irony of it all!

Where I live in Florida, Muscovy ducks are generally considered a nuisance. They serenely waltz across our thoroughfares, lost and content in their own ducky thoughts. There is never any concern that a car is coming, or - how fast. Quite the socialites - for all of their "ugliness", they are found in groups - and just like the very elite - are never concerned very much about anyone else or anything else, but their own Muscovian agendas.

Poorly trained in bathroom hygiene and generous to a fault, they gleefully leave large deposits wherever they go. Someone, somewhere along the line, surely told them that all Florida driveways and sidewalks are Muscovy banks. Especially fond of church parking lots, day care center walkways, shopping centers, front door steps, right next to your car - no pedestrian walkway is sacred. Since their deposits are rarely found in the grass, one can only gather that they think they are making a valuable contribution to the "greening of the concrete".

When I first met my husband, his idea was that the only good Muscovy duck was one in a roasting pan, and he routinely ran them off his property. Oh, he didn't want to eat one, he just wanted them off his land. They really rankled him, because they left messes everywhere, came uninvited to the yard and ran "roughshod" over the entire lawn. He had a decided "must-drive-Muscovy-ducks-away" mindset, and on the rampage he would go. I never noticed that they caused any harm, and loved to see them with their little ones, but I just kept my peace and observed.

It was a regular thing...they would show up, he would see them, and shortly thereafter, they would be waddling off as fast as Muscovy ducks can waddle - towards someone else's domain. As much as I hated to see them run off, I just "shut up". Not my place to say anything, and I figured God would handle it. Little did I know...

Archimedes in her Muscovian prime!

Archimedes in her Muscovian prime!

Roast Duckling, Anyone?

I never roasted a duckling in my life!

One summer afternoon, about 2 years ago - before my husband WAS my husband - he called me at my jewelry store.

He asked me if I knew how to fix roast duckling. I told him that I really didn't, but by the time I got home, I would. As soon as he hung up the phone - PRESTO CHANGO! - I had stopped what I was doing online, and was pulling up roast duckling recipes like a mad woman. I so loved him and wanted to please him, and I still do, that I figured I'd have some terrific recipes pulled up, printed out, and propped up on the kitchen counter when I got home, before you could say "Jack Sprat"!

Rushing out of the store that night, as soon as I could feasibly get away, I came in the door, put down my things, and told my husband I was ready. He had a HUGE butcher knife in his hand, and called me out into the garage. The knife was put in my hand, and he showed me where the roast duckling was to be prepared.

In a box, on the garage floor, were two little darling baby Muscovy ducks. I thought he was serious...really, I did. I thought at first, that he was going to eat them! He took one look at my face, and burst out laughing; picked one up and put it into my arms, and he picked up and held the other one. Boy, was I relieved! He said he was outside, and these two little sweeties were just lost - he's pretty sure he heard their mother being eaten by one of the alligators that live in the lake. They were just making little baby Muscovy duck noises, and scared as they could be.

He told me he had quite a job running them down, and none of the other Muscovies had been around. He HAD to catch them - we have raccoons, and foxes, and cats, and alligators. He COULDN'T just let them die!

So, we named them. I named mine, which was brown and yellow, Archimedes - his, which was all yellow, was Einstein. We didn't have a clue if they were male or female, but the names suited them so! His was the clever one - always investigating, finding bugs, following us around the lanai, nibbling on my husband's orchids, sampling the orchid mix. Mine, I named Archimedes as a joke, because "he" appeared to be so clueless - about everything, completely unlike the Greek scientist for which I named "him".

Unfortunately, a few weeks later, Einstein had passed away - we never knew why. We just found him peacefully lying on his side in the cage, expired. THAT was not a happy day. However, MY duck, Archimedes...lives on.

Archimedes trying to appear sophisticated - "reading" my placemat!

Archimedes trying to appear sophisticated - "reading" my placemat!

Archimedes is in Love!

With my husband, that is...

Well, lo and behold!

The surviving orphaned Muscovy duck - MINE - falls in love with my husband! No, really - she did! She merely tolerates me; him - she adores! She's movin' in on my territory, the fickle flighty fowl, and even decided to come in for dinner one night, and flew right up to MY CHAIR. There she is, in the photo, just as proud as she can be, looking over the menu - I TOLD you she wasn't too bright - that's a PLACEMAT, but you can't tell HER that!

We got into the habit of bringing her into the house once in a while. She follows my husband like a sheep - no, not like a puppy dog - like a sheep. Right at his heels she is, waddling as fast as she can move, and into the kitchen they go. She looks up at the refrigerator, as if to say - "Well, let's go. Whaddya got in there for me, today?" He'll give her a little piece of hot dog - YUCK! - I don't eat the nasty things, or a piece of string cheese, or some fresh greens. As the "hired help", in Archimedes' opinion, I am allowed to feed her, so, she'll take food from me, too - BUT - I am distinctly told, in Muscovian, to "keep my distance". She views me as the maid - a servant, who cleans her cage, and brings her fresh food and water and greens - but, nothing more. That's gratitude for you - someone probably told her I gave her a man's name!

Archimedes checking out the kitchen floor.

Archimedes checking out the kitchen floor.

One Lovesick Duck!

Typical female...yak, yak, yak...

I am also a female, but not a very typical one.

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This female, Archimedes, is so in love with my dear husband, that I am - literally - THE ENEMY. Oh, it is painfully obvious.

Before I take off for work in the morning, I go outside to drink my coffee - right next to her cage. I always speak to her, every morning. "Well, good morning, Archimedes, how are you?" What's her response? A reluctant, begrudging tail wag, and a bill up in the air. Sometimes, she is even so "uppity" that she turns on her heels, away from me. When HE opens the door, and says "Good morning, Archimedes, how's my little girl?" - she goes bananas. I am NOT KIDDING! It literally sounds like she is screaming at the top of her lungs, and her voice box is about to break. The tail wags like a whisk broom on adrenaline, her feathers fluff out, and she spends about 5 full minutes talking gibberish non-stop, and THIS is how it goes...

"Oh, my gosh, Dad, you won't believe what happened last night - there were 1.600 Canadian wild geese coming at me from the north, the south, the east, the west - it was terrible! I fought them all off, and defended the house, while you and the 'maid' - what's her name - were asleep, and a snake got into my cage, and I killed it, and I don't know WHO drug that orchid into my cage, and I saw an eclipse of the moon, and a falling star, and Saturn came to visit, and someone tried to break in the back door, but I bit him in the leg, and there was a fruit rat in the corn and I ripped him to shreds, and I want to go shopping later --- come up for air --- "and when can I come in the house again, and don't you think my feathers are pretty, and if you get rid of the 'maid', I'll clean the house, and cook your meals, and mend your clothes, and why do we need her, anyway, and can I sleep in your bed, and ride in the car...I'll behave - OK?"

That's just a small sample of how psycho she sounds, and it's a wonder she isn't hoarse!

To demonstrate her utter disdain for me, she has perfected the art of spitting her water at the backs of my legs and precisely on the top of my right foot, right on the instep. Of course, it runs right down into my shoe or slipper - MISSION ACCOMPLISHED! I told my husband that she actually missed a few days ago - simply, because I moved. Right there on the lanai pebble rock, where my foot usually is, was a perfect watermark, freshly delivered by a jealous female duck! She NEVER spits at him - not ever, not even once... just... at me.

Water your Duck! - Archimedes needed it, so she could SPIT at me!

Muscovy ducks need fresh water available to them at all times. Automatic watering device are a great option, to keep your pet Muscovy duck well supplied with a fresh source of water.

We own this, and love it!

Are you listening to me, Dad?

Are you listening to me, Dad?

Archimedes Speaks, and Speaks, and Speaks

Are you listening?

"Oh, Daaaaaaad..."

This is her classic pose, right after she has gone through her "Psycho, Psycho Duck" routine, where she enlightens my husband about everything that has happened overnight - real or imagined. She cocks her head at what appears to be an unnatural angle, and ask him, in the ancient Muscovian tongue - "Are you listening?" Mind you, she never asks me - she could care less. She doesn't wish to speak with me, anyway. The pose is held, until he responds, and then she usually has some other juicy morsel to add to her previous maniacal repertoire.

One day, when she decided she could fly, she took off at a great pace, and flew solidly into the pool screen. Down like a rock she dropped, stumbling over clay orchid pots, scattering orchids and destroying a few. She stumbled to her feet, looked mortified and embarrassed - oh, yes, she did! - and looked around for my husband. He heard the din, and came out on the lanai and went straight over to her, to see if she was all right. That little manipulator sidled right up next to him, and launched into an accusation against me that really should have turned her tongue black. You could almost understand her - REALLY!

"Dad, oh, Dad! I'm so glad you're here! You're not going to believe what SHE" - that's me - "did this time. She grabbed me by the throat, drug me out of my cage, swung me around her head six times - yes, it was six - I counted, and flung me with all of her might, at the screen. My whole life flashed before my eyes, I was terrified, I thought I was going to break my neck, I knew she'd be the death of me some day, it was only a matter of time, you need to get rid of her, you just don't know what she's like!"

All the while Archimedes was telling her tale of woe, she accentuated her tall tale with multiple stabbings of her head in my direction. Periodically, she'd stop, cock her head, and ask him if he was listening. Once he responded, she'd launch right back into her tirade. We were both laughing so much, we almost cried.

This goes on, on a regular basis. I "pull her tail feathers" - I never did - "spit in her food" - give me a break - "kick her in the shins" - not once - and "call her names".

Well, that part's true...I call her "Archimedes", and "darling", and "girl". Technically, those are names. The worst part of this is, that she is - was - MY duck, the turncoat! My husband has another woman in his life, and I can't do anything about it. I have been wrongfully accused, by "the other woman", and what's really so bad about it --- she's a duck! What am I going to do?

On Amazon - and I could have written it!

Sometimes, the book doesn't show up, but it comes back. If it's not up here, the name of the book is: Enslaved by Ducks, by Bob Tarte. I seriously could have written a book by that name, about our little "out-of-her-mind" Muscovy duck.

See how spoiled she is? She squawked and screamed until my husband put her favorite channel on our television set!

See how spoiled she is? She squawked and screamed until my husband put her favorite channel on our television set!

So, we own a Muscovy Duck...

And God got back at my husband!

It's been almost 2 years now.

She is as much a part of our family, as if she was one of the children. Except, I'd have blistered her hide, for her behavior and lies, if she was really my child. Archimedes loves to come in and perch on the edge of the couch, as close to my husband as she can possibly get, and run her beak through his hair. She picks up several strands, and rearranges them to her liking. If she is swimming in the pool, and we forget she is out, she'll come up to the sliding glass doors, and tap on them with her beak, until we pay attention.

In the photo, she is trying to convince him to let her stay for dinner. The flash didn't go off, so forgive the photo, it's the only one I could get of her debate. You see who "rules the roost", don't you? Look at what is on the TV!

That peculiar duck follows him around the pool, right at his heels, and would follow him anywhere. He just loves her - he who was a Muscovy Duck Detester - not that terribly long ago. She has changed his entire outlook on Muscovy ducks, and even mine. We found that you will not have any roaches or Palmetto bugs around if you have Muscovy ducks on your property. Their very name came from the fact that they love mosquito larvae, and spiders, and ants, and all sorts of bugs. They do NOT quack, they are NOT aggressive, and they become very attached to particular people. They are good with their mates, protective of their families, and good providers.

So, see? I didn't have to open my mouth. God taught my husband a valuable lesson, about the ducks he was running out of our yard. Nothing I could have said would have been as effective as what came providentially. He sent him a very special, loving, adoring, beautiful female Muscovy duck, and she is his darlin' girl.

From our copy of Corporal Haggis

From our copy of Corporal Haggis

A Muscovy World War II Corporal

Did you know that there was a Muscovy Duck Corporal, that served his country well, during the second World War? Well, there was! Occasionally, on Amazon, you can purchase : Corporal Haggis: The Wartime Diary of a Muscovy Duck, September 1943-May 1945.

This remarkable duck gave its life, in service to his country. His comrades mourned his death, as earnestly as if he had been a real, live genuine soldier. Quite a story, this is - with a sad, heart-wrenching ending.

Well, "by gum", there's more than ONE way to "pluck a duck"!

Amazon does not seem to have the photo for this book, at present, even though we uploaded images for Lefty's Place, and Corporal Haggis, and they are both there, so here is ours!

No photo from Amazon, but here's the book!

One of Archimedes' relatives, in our roasting pan. I had to prove to her, that her "dearly beloved dad" really did eat duck!

One of Archimedes' relatives, in our roasting pan. I had to prove to her, that her "dearly beloved dad" really did eat duck!

Finally...I got her attention!

You know what they say - "Every dog has his day". Well, today - was mine!

That spiteful, sneaky duck has been snapping at me, and threatening me, and spitting water at me, and relieving herself on me, for a long, long time. On this red-letter day in "Muscovy Land", I brought her vile vindictiveness to a screeching halt.

My husband has wanted to have roast duck, for the last nine festive holidays. Well, each time, one thing or another came up, and it just - didn't - happen. So,...today - he finally got his wish! He thawed out the duck yesterday, stuffed it with half of an apple, three stalks of celery, a third of a large onion, and seasoned it with salt and pepper. Into the oven it went, for 2½ hours at 375°F, and voilá - succulent roast duck!

"Well, now," I thought to myself - "here is my golden opportunity. Time for a little "ducky" ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT...

I told Archimedes. She didn't believe me. I showed her the photo. Now, she does.

Well, what do you know? One photo, one tiny little photo, waved in the direction of our jealous, spiteful fowl, and a sweeter Muscovy duck, you wouldn't want to meet. She has seen the light! Archimedes didn't know that my husband really does love duck - roast duck!

She never dreamed that he would stoop to eating one of her relatives. I proved her wrong.

She was horrified. I felt justified. This duck had needed a good "comeuppance".

She swallowed hard, hung her head, and offered what I suppose would pass for an "I'm sorry, would you please forgive me?" squeak. Well, of course, I did - but - I know her kind. Just as soon as my husband shows her the slightest attention, I'll be "mud" in her eyes. She has a short memory, and she'll be up to her old tricks again, but - that's okay. I'm going to have the photo framed and hang it in her cage, as a gentle reminder that I, too, know how to roast duck - Muscovy duck!

So, we just co-exist - the duck and I.

She knows the score; we see eye-to-eye.

If she doesn't behave, in lieu of her bed...

She'll rest in a roaster - as dinner, instead!

Another Adopted Muscovy Duck

Hawaii Five-O Muscovy Pet - Intro is long, but keep with it!

So,...what does a Muscovy Duck eat? - Well, this is what Archimedes eats!

muscovy_duck

Muscovy Duck Paraphernalia on Amazon

Epicurean Delights for a Muscovy Duck

Unlike most Muscovy Ducks, Archimedes indulges in gourmet fare, such as...

  • hot dogs
  • prosciutto
  • extra sharp vermont cheddar cheese
  • baby orchids - well, she is not SUPPOSED to!
  • oyster shell
  • gravel
  • one solitary slug
  • eggs
  • wheat germ
  • clover
  • Moringa seedlings - she doesn't like those, thank God!
  • palmetto bugs
  • roaches
  • layena crumbles
  • scratch
  • game bird maintenance
  • AND - my SLIPPERS, and my FEET! Well, she nips them - a LOT!

Most of those things are good for her, some are not!

Archimedes Recommends...

Once in a while, Archimedes asks us to tell you some things. IF she asks politely, we'll oblige her. She thinks you need to see this article, about another person we know, who is detested by her pet.

  • Archimedes finds a kindred spirit - in a rabbit.
    Well, what do you know? Someone else hates their owner - you have to see this rabbit's disdain for it's mistress. Goodness, the rabbit has a Simon Legree complex, and makes me look like Little Bo Peep! Definitely a "must-read"!
From our copy of Lefty's Place

From our copy of Lefty's Place

Another Terrific Muscovy Duck Book

Lefty's Place, is another wonderful book we have, about a Muscovy Duck. There just aren't that many around, so if you are a Muscovy Duck lover, snatch one up while you can!

Photo Credits

All images photographed by me - E. Tack

I'll read these to her...

...the comments, I mean. She gets bored, so this will be something else she can talk about to my husband, and talk...she will!

© 2010 Emily Tack

Tell Archimedes what you think! - She can read, too, you know!

Emily Tack (author) from USA on April 11, 2015:

Cynthia, I am so glad you liked Archimedes' story. The story was true, at least, what I wrote about her antics was! I am fairly certain that my interpretation of what she was saying to my husband was truthful, too, as I came to understand Muscovyese over a period of years.

No wonder her story made you laugh so hard, since you have a goat that "hates" you, too!

Like you, I prefer duck eggs to chicken eggs. They are so rich and delicious! Those ducks you have will stick around, if you feed them. They can be "bought" easily with duck food or whole corn.

Please don't let the ducks that are coming to your home smell roasting duck - they will never forgive you.

Again, I am so glad you enjoyed it. We miss her.

Cynthia Hoover from Newton, West Virginia on April 10, 2015:

I am so sorry that Archimedes passed away. What a delightful funny little duck she must have been. I two have a pet that hates me ( I think he does at times) a goat. He loves me when I have produce to feed him though. If given the chance he will ram me with his horns when I am not watching!

I have wanted ducks for a while now, I prefer baking with duck eggs. My fiance' told me "I don't think they will stick around". Our property is bordered by a river, so he assumes they will likely go for a swim and never return.

I do make roast duck from time to time, and it is delicious, I have never used an apple though (will be trying with the next one).

This was an incredible read! I laughed so hard my sides hurt!

Emily Tack (author) from USA on February 28, 2015:

No, peachpurple, we did not kill her. She rather peacefully passed away on Mother's Day, a couple of years ago. We DO miss her, and shall NEVER forget her incredible personality! She so loved my husband...

peachy from Home Sweet Home on February 28, 2015:

So, you didn't kill tour ducky, did you? She sounds like a cute pet to me

Emily Tack (author) from USA on January 27, 2015:

Thank you, Gemini Fox! I hope your mother forgave Cleo. I have thick skin, and big shoulders - emotionally, that is. I was glad that it was my husband she preferred, if she had to make a choice.

Oh, yes - we fed her canned grasshoppers, and live crickets, too. Thankfully, she did not want to be fed spiders and snakes. That would have been the straw that broke THIS camel's back!

Gemini Fox on January 26, 2015:

LOVE the way you write!

Isn't it strange the way a pet will choose a favorite human, though? My mother found a stray semi-feral kitten and adopted her. When I moved out to OK to help my mother, her kitten, Cleo, just took an immediate liking to me - and for some reason turned on my mother. You seemed to have taken your duck-rejection rather well; my mother was not too happy!

Please, please tell me it ain't so . . . 'canned' grasshoppers?!?! Oh.My.Word. Eeeewwwwwwww!!!

Emily Tack (author) from USA on October 26, 2014:

Thank you, DrMark 1961 - hope it made you chuckle. I know how geese can be, as we have some that visit us often. In our case, the geese are Canadian Wild Geese, and they give EVERYONE a run for their money. If they stayed in Canada, that would be fine, but they prefer to come to Florida!

Dr Mark from The Atlantic Rain Forest, Brazil on October 25, 2014:

Great duck tale! I used to have ducks, but they bullied my geese so badly that I had to get rid of them. Now I just have to deal with the geese--which are every bit as bad as Archimedes.

Emily Tack (author) from USA on October 16, 2014:

Thank you, Susan! Good to see you here, and I am so glad that Archimedes' story put a smile on your face. She was a "corker"!

Susan Deppner from Arkansas USA on October 16, 2014:

What a wonderful duck tale! I haven't spent much time around ducks but I totally believe the monologues you described. Reminds me of Daisy, our dog, who likes me just fine but adores "dad." Thanks for making me smile this morning!

Emily Tack (author) from USA on May 09, 2014:

@aishu19: I'm fairly sure I interpreted her conversation correctly. Glad you liked it!

Emily Tack (author) from USA on May 09, 2014:

@KathyMcGraw2: Oh, I made the "Duck TV" thing. She thought that was what she was watching, anyway!

Emily Tack (author) from USA on May 09, 2014:

@Tyla MacAllister: Well, if you do get one, get a male. Maybe it will love you. Archimedes disdained me!

Emily Tack (author) from USA on May 09, 2014:

@SusannaDuffy: No, she can't, but her food was "dirt-cheap". We bought it in 50-lb bags! Thank you for the blessing!

Emily Tack (author) from USA on May 09, 2014:

@WildFacesGallery: Thank you, darlin'!

Emily Tack (author) from USA on May 09, 2014:

@HorseAndPony LM: Thank you for stopping by, and I am so glad you liked it. She was a character!

Emily Tack (author) from USA on May 09, 2014:

@huvalbd: Well, now, I haven't written about our guinea pigs, yet. We only have one female, and four males. The female has my husband wrapped around her little finger...

Emily Tack (author) from USA on May 09, 2014:

@Tyla MacAllister: THANK YOU! I am so far behind in replies - my apologies!

Emily Tack (author) from USA on May 09, 2014:

@anonymous: I did NOT know that the herons eat baby ducks. I will keep an eye open from now on...

Emily Tack (author) from USA on May 09, 2014:

@anonymous: I am SO glad that you liked it!

Emily Tack (author) from USA on May 09, 2014:

@Snakesmum: Archimedes did have a husband. We named him Murdock. She passed away a couple of years ago, but Murdock still comes to see us!

Emily Tack (author) from USA on May 09, 2014:

@anonymous: Love it!

Emily Tack (author) from USA on May 09, 2014:

@anonymous: Wow! Nine cats and a Muscovy duck...

anonymous on March 06, 2012:

What a delightful tale! Archimedes' story reminds me a lot of our Muscovies, Hamlet & Ophelia (both male it turns out). Hamlet follows my partner David everywhere. Ophelia is my baby. In addition to some of the foods you mentioned, they also love tomatoes, cucumbers, and squash. Hamlet likes bananas. We live in Maine, so they have their own bedroom in the house and use the bathtub (I put on my rain gear for that).

anonymous on February 12, 2012:

i have a muscovy too she dominates my affection, gets on great with my nine cats you told a beautiful love story

Snakesmum on September 05, 2011:

Wonder if you should get a husband for Archimedes? Perhaps he will become YOUR friend? :-) Great story.

anonymous on June 25, 2011:

Just got 12 khaki campbell ducklings yesterday. YAY - Ducky love.

Anyway, I googled "ducks eat moringa" since I was wondering whether moringa would make good duck fodder. That lead me here. I gather Archimedes says "Ducks don't like moringa" - true? Oh well, so much for that plan. . . .

My dear husband was trying to sleep on my lap while I was reading this but my stomach started shaking too violently from my laughter and I woke him up. Funny stuff!

anonymous on April 14, 2011:

hahhaha too funny . we live on a lake and have named several of our Muscovy ducks. We have Spot aka stud muffin, he comes when called. The girls are Silver who will only eat on top of our party room down by the dock, mama duck who will only eat in dog pen with bread in a water bowl. bawled eagle, baby silver, bethy duck , dotty, pretty girl, Charlene, Isaiah 1 and Isaiah 2. they come when called. bawled eagle just had 18 babies. I was thrilled. but I know their numbers will dwindle as they will be floating appetizers to the gators. Did you know the great white Herons also eat the baby ducks? Just disgusting! Well Archimedes I wish you could meet my girls as they are pretty chatty too.

Tyla MacAllister on February 23, 2011:

As you know I've visited before but I had to return and give this wonderful lens a Squid Angel blessing.

huvalbd on February 16, 2011:

Delightful lens! I'm glad Pandora the alpha guinea pig bosses me around more gently.

HorseAndPony LM on January 03, 2011:

This was too funny. What a great lens. I love reading about Archimedes. She sounds like a wonderful girl. Thanks for sharing!!!

Mona from Iowa on October 09, 2010:

This is such a sweet and funny story. We kept geese a long time until the coyotes starting thinning them. At that point we rehomed the remaining birds to a safer coyote-free farm. I miss them greatly, but not the poop. Mind you are yard grass was so thick and luxurious it was like carpet. We also raised a couple of orphans (named them Hunt and Peck) We never bonded quite like you (or perhaps more accurately your husband) and Archimedes though. :) Seriously great lens.

Susanna Duffy from Melbourne Australia on June 14, 2010:

But can she pay the bills? It costs me a small fortune to feed the ducks in my creek - I'm sure they can manage on their own but I always get extra bread so that I have some "over". Blessed by an angel today(/one-hundred-lens-blessings)

Emily Tack (author) from USA on June 07, 2010:

@Cute to Boot: Oh, yeah! She hates me. I barely escape with all of my toes intact, whenever I clean out her cage...that would be, every day. Ungrateful foul fowl, and what's worse, she was MY duck!

Cute to Boot on May 29, 2010:

How funny, it seems we are kindred spirits! What a life it is to be unloved by your pet :) Great read!

Tyla MacAllister on May 27, 2010:

I know how you feel. All of our female pets prefer my husband even though I'm the one who usually takes care of them. Like Archimedes,they treat me like the "help."

We have a wild flock of muscovies who live in the lake and come to steal dog food,I mean "visit" a few times a week. The big males seem to have realized that I'm a sucker and will give them whatever they want if they wag their tails at me. The girls are shy but they definitely seem to respond more to my hubby.

I've never kept a Muscovy as a pet before but I think it would be awesome. I hope I get the chance to raise some ducklings one day.

Kathy McGraw from California on May 26, 2010:

I laughed and laughed at this....it is one of the best reads I've had in a long time. The way you told this story is priceless :) "Duck TV" how in the world did you do that, or was it really on?

aishu19 on May 26, 2010:

That is a wonderful story. Its funny how not only the duck absolutely loves your husbands..but its nice to see your version on what the duck could be telling him...

Bus Stop Toy Shop on May 19, 2010:

Lovely story, and very funny too! I have a wife who's obsesssed with ducks...

Jennifer Sullivan from Chicago, IL on April 21, 2010:

Hilarious lens! Blessed by a squidangel.

Indigo Janson from UK on April 20, 2010:

~*~* Angel Blessings *~*~ to this little duck!

Joan4 on April 17, 2010:

Delightful! What a super fun read! Love to Archimedes!

luvmyludwig lm on April 13, 2010:

this was such a fun lens...I love the tirade bits...just great!

anonymous on April 12, 2010:

This is the very best duck love story I've ever read! Well, honestly it is the only duck love story I've ever read...still it is fantastic!

Jennifer P Tanabe from Red Hook, NY on April 12, 2010:

Fun story great lens! Thanks for sharing. Archimedes, you're famous!

GrowWear on April 12, 2010:

Such a great story. Archimedes is one lovable duck!

kimmanleyort on April 12, 2010:

What a great story! We so underestimate the animal world. I am so glad I found this lens through Squidoo Lens Reviews.

Indigo Janson from UK on April 09, 2010:

Please let Archimedes know that she is going to be featured on the Squidoo Lens Reviews blog on Monday (12 April)! If she likes, she can waddle on over and collect a review badge. :)

Emily Tack (author) from USA on March 26, 2010:

@SusannaDuffy: Oh, I am so glad, susannaduffy, that it made you laugh! Why did you have to clean up the bricks and concrete - if you just lieave it alone, it solidifies beautifully...I hear it is all the latest, in "sidewalk décor".

Emily Tack (author) from USA on March 26, 2010:

@Stazjia: Thank you, Stazjia - but, I assure you - she's only adorable when my husband is around. When I show up, she "huffs" at me, and stabs at me, and spits at me...other than that, she's fairly well behaved!

Emily Tack (author) from USA on March 26, 2010:

@indigoj: Victor thought it was funny!

Susanna Duffy from Melbourne Australia on March 26, 2010:

I had 3 Muscovies once (I see another Australian did too!) and I just loved what they did for my garden. I didn't like what they did to my patio and front path though, carrying out the buckets of laundry water merely to wash down bricks and concrete was an unnecessary waste of water. All the same, they were happy creatures to have around and made me laugh, just as your lens made me laugh.

Carol Fisher from Warminster, Wiltshire, UK on March 25, 2010:

Your Muscovy duck sounds adorable and I just love your stories about her. Brilliant lens.

Indigo Janson from UK on March 25, 2010:

@Shades-of-truth: LOL... it's OK, you can tell Victor I was just joking, really I was. ;) I don't think there should be any grilling or roasting going on here. Not ducks, not Victor, not anybody. And especially not Archimedes. :)

Emily Tack (author) from USA on March 19, 2010:

@norma-holt: To all of you - thank you! Archimedes thinks she's on a roll, now - you should see her strut! It is going to break her heart, if anyone thinks she isn't pretty, too - cause my husband tells her she is. I reserve comments re: that.

Skiesgreen - Archimedes says "You're right! They don't taste good - everyone knows that." Hmmm, I wonder whose hide she's protecting...

Word Custard - I...told...Victor...what you said! Whooo-whee! The rest of you - duck kisses for all - on the house.

norma-holt on March 19, 2010:

Very well written and engaging story. I once owned 3 muscovies, as well as other ducks. They loved the gold fish in the ponds despite having their own huge pond. I once chased one around the garden to get a large fish from its beak. But they are lovely and, by the way, I don't think they are so good to eat but great egg layers. Top marks and lensrolled to Pet Health

Norma

Indigo Janson from UK on March 17, 2010:

This is wonderful. She sounds such a character, thanks for sharing such an engaging story. By the way, I definitely heard somewhere that Victor (see below) tastes better when grilled. ;)

anonymous on March 16, 2010:

Ducks are Particularly more friendly when they are raised by hand. And Muscovy Ducks are also one of the best Roasting Ducks you can get. Some say they are better then the Peking ducks, because they have more meat on them. You might like Archimedes better with a little Potatoes and gravy on the side. Maybe now is a good time to try some of those Recipes.

RinchenChodron on March 14, 2010:

Very cleaverly written. Great photos. Aren't you jealous? Five stars.

Emily Tack (author) from USA on March 14, 2010:

@Shades-of-truth: Make that "her in action" - typing too fast!

Emily Tack (author) from USA on March 14, 2010:

@askfault: Totally not natural - females are quiet - I is one.

Emily Tack (author) from USA on March 14, 2010:

@garyrh1: Ah! Weird it is, but she is ours! Loved your thing about Charlton Heston, and commented on it.

Emily Tack (author) from USA on March 14, 2010:

@oztoo lm: Love that comment! Thank you so much! She keeps us in hysterics, and....she just spit at me, again, this morning!

Emily Tack (author) from USA on March 14, 2010:

@LisaMarieGabriel: Thanks! Wish you could see here in action!

Lisa Marie Gabriel from United Kingdom on March 13, 2010:

Wonderful and entertaining lens. I loved it! I can just visualize that jealous duck! Welcome to Squidoo! :) 5*

oztoo lm on March 13, 2010:

Archimedes, jealousy is not at all becoming. I'd be careful if I were you, that long suffering maid of yours might just up and throw you in the pot.

Great story and 5*s

garyrh1 on March 13, 2010:

I always think it is weird when people tell me they have pet ducks or chickens, because I grew up on a small farm where we had them for uhm... other purposes. But it does seem to be in growing popularity within the United States to own them as pets. I still think it is weird though.

askfault on March 13, 2010:

Seems to be quite an entertaining pet.

Also, if she wears out her welcome you could remind her to learn some new tricks or show her the oven.

I'd bet she learns some new tricks.

Odd the being a female duck that she'd speak all the time.

Is that natural I wonder?

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